From: "floribelle maximo" ARASHI by flori-dono Disclaimer: This is a Rurouni Kenshin-inspired fan fiction. The author is not making any money out of this. The characters of Rurouni Kenshin belong to Watsuki Nobuhiro, Shounen Jump, and Sony and others that should be mentioned but were not. AUTHOR'S NOTES: PARTS 9 and UP ARE LOADED. Domou arigatou to Jan Story and Lily-dono for making clear about the timeline. To Ate Tin Mandigma, thanks for reading my work and for the encouragement. To my friend SUE ANNE AMOROSO: HAPPY EIGHTEENTH BIRTHDAY!!!! PART 6 I forced my body to get up. I added another hundred more bruises to nurse, like what I would do everyday. "Is that what you call an attack?" Kotake-sama sneered at me. "You'll get killed in a second." What? That was my best move! I grimaced inside. We've been training for six hours straight and I haven't even had breakfast yet. Kotake-sama proved to be a very harsh taskmaster. Every morning, since he ordered me to train, he'd work me out until my body is covered with bruises from head to toe. Not only that, I still had the afternoons to complete my chores. After all, I was still a servant. Even if it was tiring and sometimes humiliating, I still tried my best to prove that Kotake-sama's decision to train me was not a waste. Even if I had mixed emotions about the whole thing, I was still grateful to him. For once in my life, I had found something that made me happy, and that was sword fighting. Our training went on like that everyday for seven years. In those seven years, I mastered several techniques. One of them was the gatotsu. In the process Kotake-sama raised me like a son, the son whom I think he still missed. It was fine by me. I've already forgotten that I was a woman. And besides I guess the way I regarded myself was affected by my father's attitude. I guess I was trying to prove that even if I was a girl, I could do things. Of course, I would usually be reminded by the other students that I was a girl. They would leer at me at times, but they knew better not to do anything more. Although seemingly being Kotake-sama's favorite, most of his students were envious of me. So most of the time, they'd just stay away. They shouldn't really be envious, for all that rigorous training I had, was just part of his plan. I could still remember how he called for me the night of my last training. I was busy washing the dishes outside when Hama-chan, another servant told me that I was being called by the master. I quickly stood up and dried my hands. Kotake-sama was not one for waiting. I rapped lightly at his door. Only when I heard his voice did I enter. "You called for me Kotake-sama?" "I want you to open that chest for me Arashi," he ordered nodding at the direction of a large chest in the corner of the room. A little curious, I obeyed him. I opened the chest and gaped at the single object inside. "Take the sword Arashi and give it to me." Gingerly, I took hold of the sword as if it was made of porcelain. I had never seen a sword as magnificently made as this. I gave it him. "Do you like this sword Arashi?" he asked, turning it around, making the blade shone as it caught light. All I could do was nod. Like it? Like was not enough to describe what I felt for the sword. At the instant I saw it, I could hear it calling for me. I felt drawn to it instantly. "How would you like to have it then?" I was stunned. "Kotake-sama...I... I... Arigatou" I stammered. The sword will be mine? I just couldn't believe it. My own sword... "Yes," he answered. "On one condition..." I looked at him, waiting for him to continue. "Be one of us!" PART 7 I tied the cloth, which bound my gi securely. I winced. It still hurt to move with the pain from my wound. It had only been a few hours since Shinta and I had our talk. Since then, I spent time contemplating about my life. "Fight for what we believe in..." Shinta's words echoed in my mind. Yes. If only I was fighting for what I believed in, like Shinta. No, there was something wrong. It is the weariness in his eyes. He wanted out too. He was getting tired of all the fighting and killing. Like me, he too had no choice but go where the water flows. Like me, he wanted to start again, but could I? Could he? Right then and there, I resolved in myself that I could. A new life may be an impossible goal to achieve but nevertheless I had to try. I was too sick of what I have become. I needed to change, for the better. As for Shinta... The door slid open once again, just in time as I leaned against the wall. It was Tomoe-san, Shinta's wife. "Please go back to bed," she said as she came up to me. "You aren't well yet." I gently refused. "Arigatou for helping me but I fear I must go now." "But your wound, it may open again..." Tomoe-san protested. "She's right Arashi-san, it wouldn't be safe for you to go in your condition." Shinta said as he walked in the room. I looked at him and smiled ruefully. "I've experienced worse, believe me," I said. "And besides, I don't think it would be any safer for all of us if I'd stay here for another minute. The Shinsengumi must be after us both. And what would the Ishinsishi say? Remember, I'm the Ishin head-hunter, they wouldn't be too happy to find their shadow nursing the enemy back to health." Shinta sighed. He knew I was right. "All right, if that is what you wish," he said. "If I cannot prevent you from leaving then perhaps you may find some use for this." Tomoe-san came forward and gave me a brown bag full of medicine. I bowed at her and thanked her. "Arigatou, Tomoe-san for taking care of me." She just acknowledged my gratitude with a slight bow. She was one lady who will never smile. It was strange that Shinta married her. I had never seen any form of affection going on between the two. I shrugged mentally; it was none of my business anyway. I looked at her now. She seemed always calm and serious. Yet, I found out that I liked her. She may not show it but I knew that she cares for Shinta deeply. I could feel it. I sighed. It was time to go. "Himura," I said to him. "Arigatou. I hope fate will be kinder next time, sayonara." "Sayonara," he replied. I got my cloak and my sword, which was leaning by the wall and started walking towards the door and out of the cabin, making sure first that no one was spying. "Arashi!" I stopped. "Fate will be kinder, trust in it." I waved my hand and continued walking. It may seem rude and cold, but I wanted to leave without breaking down. This chance encounter with my old friend brought me back to the past. A past which I thought I had buried long before but seemed to have come alive to haunt me. A past which I knew I would face and must win over to start anew. I thanked Shinta for making me see this, for awakening my strength and hope. To see things more clearly, that my life was not controlled by any other except for myself. I knew that we both were puppets in fate's hand. I just hoped that he too would find a way to break free of the strings. I smiled the truest smile I had ever worn in years. Yes, fate will be kinder next time. PART 8 I knew why I agreed with his condition. Saying that it was only because of the sword would be superficial. Besides, it wasn't the reason. It was more of paying back what I owed Kotake-sama. That night, I pledged to Kotake-sama that I would become one of his mercenaries. I could still see his smile when I said yes. It bothered me, I must admit. It was like telling me that I was getting myself into something that I wasn't really aware of. And I wasn't! I found out that Kotake-sama and his group were hired assassins, which call themselves Shadows. Corrupt officials of the government would hire them to do their dirty work. I found out that the gold in carriage I was in when I first met Kotake-sama actually belonged to a high-ranking officer in the army. He paid a large amount for opium, which was sold secretly by the owners of the slave-den where I was brought. Being miserly as well as corrupt, he hired Kotake-sama to get back his gold. At first, I was given small assignments and still, he would always make sure that they were group ones. Most of my fellow assassins or thieves or what ever you would call us underestimated me, even if they knew it was Kotake-sama who trained me personally. Our leader would just assign me as watchman as the others loot out government carriages or steal precious documents. I was never put into action. So I never got to kill anyone. I was quite thankful for that. I would always pray to Buddha that there wouldn't come a time for me to slay anybody. But I guess that my prayers weren't heard. After a couple of months, I was assigned to one of the more serious missions. And that mission I could never forget. I was stunned when I learned that my father's daimyo, Yamada Shintaro was our next target. This time, Kotake-sama himself was with us. "Sensei, how would we do about the whole thing?" asked one of my fellow Shadows. Kotake-sama ignored the question. "Arashi, I want you to do this by yourself." I was as stunned as the others were. Why me? "The others, you be the watchers!" he said. "But sensei," Hiro our leader interrupted. I hated him. Even when I just started training, he gave me the creeps. "I don't think she can do it. She's just a girl!" I shot him a poisonous look. Merely a girl? It was one of the things which I hated hearing. He was just like my father! I had to prove this baka that I wasn't just a girl. So even if I was nervous, I said yes. Kotake-sama nodded, and to Hiro he said. "Are you the sensei around here, Hiro? You know I don't tolerate impertinence." "Gomen nasai, sensei," he said quietly, yet I could feel the contempt in his voice. Several hours later, I returned to the town where I was born. Everything was both familiar and unfamiliar to me. The little farmers' huts were the same and the rice fields were the same. I suddenly felt the urge to visit home. I wanted otousan to see what I've become. I wanted to see the confusion in his eyes when he sees me, because I didn't think he would recognize me at all. But a mission is still a mission. Otousan would have to wait. It was a fairly simple one. I only had to get some documents from inside. But my instruction was to kill anybody who would get in my way. The Shadows surrounded the house as I got ready. It was easy since I had a lighter body, I moved faster. In a few minutes, I was in. I quickly made way towards Yamada's room where I knew the documents were kept. Quietly, I sneaked inside the room. I recognized Yamada. He was there bent over some papers, writing. There was no time to wait till he was done; I had to kill him. This was the first time that I had to kill someone. I crept behind him. With trembling fingers, I seized my wakizashi. I closed my eyes and counted silently. Ichi... Ni... San...! I stabbed him. He turned around. He wasn't dead yet. I panicked, so I stabbed him again and again until his body was lifeless and limp. Inhale...exhale... inhale... It was suddenly hard to breathe. I could feel the wetness of perspiration on my forehead and on my back. I wiped my hand quickly off blood and searched for the papers. I found it beneath his seat. Suddenly the door slid open. "Daimyo!" Without a thought, I drew my katana and slashed at the owner of the voice. "Kill any possible witnesses!" was Kotake-sama's instruction, which I followed to the letter. The body fell towards me and on reflex, I caught it. I looked at the man's face and I was surprised. It was Otousan. I gasped. He was dying. He looked up and saw my eyes. "A...ra...shi," he said in his final breath. I heard the sound of a small stone as it landed near me from the open window. It was the signal that my time was up. I gently lay my Otousan's body on the floor and left as planned. When I got back to the group, I handed Kotake-sama the documents. "Good work Arashi," he said. I could feel Hiro's glare behind my back. I nodded and was silent all the way back. Dammit, I killed my own father! And what scared me the most about that was I didn't feel anything. It was just nothing. I killed my father and I felt nothing! I didn't even cry. After that incident, I became numb. Maybe because deep inside, I was afraid. Afraid of what? Afraid that someday, I would actually start to like killing. Afraid that someday, I would actually enjoy seeing people die in my hands. I wanted to become numb in order not to feel anything. Even guilt or remorse. Because I thought that if I started to feel, I would lose control and become a freak, a monster. It was that numbness which became my mask to hide the fact that I was scared. Scared of what I would become. At the back of my mind, I wanted to stop. I wanted to tell Kotake-sama that I wanted out but I never had the courage to do so. First, I felt in debt to him. Without him, I could never have survived (Although I couldn't say that I actually enjoyed my life when he took me in his care. Would I be in the same predicament as the one I was in if I hadn't met him? I guess answering that would be pointless anyway. I owed him for teaching me kenjutsu. It may sound like I'm going in circles, or even redundant, but in kenjutsu I found my worth. And the other thing, and I think the more important one, I guess is that as an assassin, I proved myself that my father was wrong. That I, as a woman was not worthless nor a disadvantage. And I think that was what held me back. My emotions were contradicting themselves and I was really confused. Up to now, looking back at what I was, could still give me headaches. Even if you ask me what I REALLY felt, I can't answer you. And I don't think I ever could. Kotake-sama was proud of me and he showed it in his own stoic way. He saw what I did as something big. A sort of transition from a sidekick to a main man. I think he realized that the Yamada mission shook me up rather badly since it was only after a few weeks when he called for me again. "Arashi," he began. "I hope you've gotten over that mission." "Ha-hai, Kotake-sama," I answered even if I hadn't. "I didn't teach you to hide in a shell, you should've expected this when you agreed to become one of my Shadows." I merely nodded. I never told him that I killed my father. "I have another assignment for you," he said. I quickly hid that FEAR again. "I hope you are aware about the growing number of people who wish to overthrow the bakufu?" "Hai." "Good," he said. "One of them, I believe, has hired us to assassinate several members of the bakufu." "You wish me to do it, sensei?" I asked, praying that the answer was a 'no', even if I knew that the effort would just be useless knowing that the answer was an obvious 'yes'. "Hai," he said. "This is a long-term agreement Arashi, so there is no backing down. And this is not as simple as it looks. The bakufu has also hired us to do some killing for them." I looked up at him in confusion. "I decided to accept both offers." "Nani?" I asked. "Demo..." "Dirty isn't it?" he asked. "But I know you can do it. You have courage and wisdom. That was why I trained you. I saw in you both." I was flattered but there was still that fear gnawing at me. Nevertheless, I accepted the mission. The following night, I slayed four members of the Ishin and three members of the bakufu. I was never caught, and only a few knew my real identity. I was always dressed in a ninja uniform and a dark cloak when I go out on missions. Who would realize that the dreaded assassin was a woman? That fact made me more dangerous. I continued doing these assignments for years. I've killed so many that I hadn't bothered counting them. And always with me were that numbness and that fear. And that was how I came to be the Cloaked Assassin. TBC ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com --------------------------- ONElist Sponsor ---------------------------- Want to send money instantly to anyone, anywhere, anytime? You can today at X.com - and we'll give you $20 to try it. Sign up today at X.com. It's quick, free, & there's no obligation. Click Here ------------------------------------------------------------------------