From the Creator of The Rice Balls of Death comes ... A Kenshin Detergent Commercial!!! Random commercial by:Lichey ********************************************************* Kenshin was doing the laundry. He liked to do the laundry. It was a simple task that didn't require special techniques or god speed. It also didn't attract any enemies or challengers. Kenshin hummed to himself as his mind drifted. "Hmm. I wonder what a laundry challenge would be like?" he mumbled. A slight breeze blew some leaves across the grass area by the river. A few birds soared by overhead. None of these things were noticed by Kenshin or his opponent. Kenshin stood behind his washing tub, both feet firmly planted. A dozen feet away stood a tall, lithe figure swathed head to toe in bandages. Both opponents stared at each other with hard, measuring glares. A silence descended upon the clearing and the breeze stopped.. "Shishio!" Kenshin's voice sliced through the tension-laced silence, "you would use your secret laundry techniques to herald a new domestic era, thus shattering the Meiji government's organization. As long as I have breath in my body I must stop you!" Shishio, standing behind his own washing tub threw back his head and laughed maniacally, "You fool! The Meiji government is weak and deserves to be replaced by my ideal new order. If I have to burn the whole country with bleach- then SO BE IT!! In this world there's only one law- The clean live and the dirty die MWAHAHAHAHAHAHa!!!" Kenshin reaches into his shirt and draws out a box of special Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu detergentT. "Then let us fight.", he says in a low whisper. Shishio reaches down behind his washing bin and brings up and special box. Kenshin felt his heart leap into his mouth at the sight of the box's label - Tide!! Suddenly, by some unseen signal, both Kenshin and Shishio whip out piles of clothing. Shishio hurls a massive heap of bloody bandages into his washing tub and Kenshin dumps in a load of Kaoru's nasty workout clothing. The ripping of box tops fills the air as both opponents dump in perfectly prepared portions of detergent. Shishio, having whipped out a washboard, starts laughing maniacally again, "HAHAHA. Now. behold my raging fire laundry technique!!" Shishio began to scrub the bandages, faster and faster, until they burst into flames! Kenshin, working furiously, noticed that only the blood on the bandages was burning away, leaving the bandages clean! "Hmm.time for some serious laundering." Kenshin thought. "Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu special technique - Cheer with Color Guard!!" Shishio looked at Kenshin dumping straight bleach on blue clothing with suspicion. Surely the famous laundry-sai knew that he just ruined the colors of Kaoru's pants. Then the meaning of what Kenshin just did sunk in. Cheer, with color guard! By using cold water, Kenshin could bleach the white shirt but not have to worry about the pants. Shishiho suddenly realized that at this rate, he would lose. Kenshin saw the barrage of SOS pads barely in time to raise his washboard to deflect the lethal fusillade. However, he paid a dear price. After the last SOS pad ricocheted of his wash board the board itself suddenly cracked and shattered. Shishio's laughter beat at Kenshin. "Ah ha! I have won. Die, laundry-sai! What??", Shishio's triumph suddenly turned to alarm as Kenshin drew from his saya an extremely shiny, sword-like object. Kenshin drew the specially shaped mirror-sword he kept in his saya. With this mirror he could perform the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu's laundry succession technique. He grabbed the clothing from his wash tub and hurled it into the air in front of him. The mirror flashed as it seemed to touch every thread of the fabric at once. The perfectly clean clothing landed into the now dry wash tube. The colors seemed to glow and the whites were blindingly white. Shishio couldn't believe the technique. Kenshin was using his sword skill to literally pick off the dirt from the garments. At the same time this secret technique also infused the garments with light to the point where they glowed! Then Shishio looked down at his own laundry and saw something, his hands. Shishio gasped in horror. How could he have gone over the 15 minute time limit! It wasn't possible! With panic making him shake, Shishio gazed down at his hands. The bandages were coming loose and he could see the... Wrinkled fingers...like prunes. Screaming, Shishio fled - WHAP!! The flying form of Yahiko suddenly filled Kenshin's vision, snapping him out of the daydream in time to be drenched by wash water as Yahiko landed IN his wash tub. Yahiko rubbed his eyes and said, "Ouch! Kaoru!! Did ya' hafta throw me so far?!" THE END Send any comments/money to stevbach@mindspring.com