From: L X Hi minna, i'm really sorry about posting in HTML. i've reposted it for those who can't read HTML and I've basically copied it directly from WordPad. i hope this isn't too long. I don't think I'm not going against any other rules, but if I am, please let me know. btw, what is a hard return? lily-dono Finding Myself by lily-dono (The Christmas Challenge: Soujiro Theme) *Disclaimers(why do i always forget this?)* Rurouni Kenshin does not belong to me. Standard disclaimers apply.* NOTE: 'stuff in' denotes thoughts 'One foot in front of another. That's how I got here. That's how I'm going to get where ever I'm going. The year's coming to an end. There are signs of it everywhere. The trees have lost most of their leaves, the wind is blowing colder, and the snow is here and staying. At least until the warm spring air chases them away. A winter breeze blows past me. I'm very glad I was given a jacket for my services at the last restaraunt. It has really come in useful. My stomach growls again. I haven't had something decent to eat for quite a while. I hope I find another town soon.' Another chilly breeze blows past Soujiro. He hugs his thin jacket close to his body. The temperature had dropped considerably since when he began his rurouni life earlier this summer. Already it was mid-afternoon, almost dusk. 'Look's like another night huddled under some trees or a rock,' Soujiro thought as he heard a sob ahead of him. Not hesistating a moment, he quietly searched for the source of the soft, muffled cries. It was a girl who was curled up within the thick foliage, muffling her sobs with her thick, woolen coat. She clutched a tear-stained letter in her hands and a basket of vegetables lay beside her, a purse lying on . He quickly approached her and in his haste, he stepped on a tree branch and it snapped under him. Soujiro winced at the sound it made. The girl looked up and noticed Soujiro. Then her gaze fell upon his sword and screamed with her hand clasped firmly on her purse. "Ahh! Thief! Get away from me! Don't hurt me, please!" the girl shrieked. "No, you don't understand. I'm a rurouni," Soujiro quickly blurted. The girl calmed down. "Rurouni?" "Hai*." "But the sword..." "Only for protection." "Oh. Well, what are you doing here? Are you spying on me?" "No, no. I heard you crying and I just came to see if I could help." The girl's face grew gloomy and she looked down. "I don't think you can." She suddenly lifted her head up again. "Look, thanks for your concern. You've got to be hungry. Why don't you come over to my place for dinner. My mother would never turn you out." Soujiro's stomach grumbled. "Hai, arigatou*." The girl smiled. "No problem. I'm Sora. Toshiono Sora." "Seta Soujiro." "Nice to meet you Soujiro-san." "Same here, Sora-dono." Sora stood up and shook Soujiro's hand. Just then, it started snowing. "We'd better get going. It's only going to get colder," Sora gestured for Soujiro to follow her. Soujiro hugged his jacket closer and continued after her. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Kasumi-san! I'm home! There's company!" Sora hollered. Her home was a small house near the outskirts of a tiny town. She walked into the kitchen and set the basket down. She quickly spoke with the older woman in the room. Sora stepped down and gestured for Soujiro to sit down at a nearby chair while she and Kasumi prepared dinner. The three sat down before a steaming dinner. Soujiro inhaled the delicious aroma. Sora happily picked up her chopsticks. "Let's dig in!" After dinner Soujiro washed the dishes and Kasumi went to bed. Sora went into her room and retrieved the letter she had hidden in her coat. She sighed and unfolded the paper. "Sora-dono. A while ago in the woods..." Without looking up, Sora quickly replied, "I bet you want to know why you found me crying." "I don't want to pry or anything..." "No, it's alright. I'd probably feel better talking about it." She sat down on her futon and motioned for Soujiro to follow suit. "It all started about a month ago. My brother, Ukyo, had gone to America a year ago. He had loved to explore and felt restless at home. He wrote me often. He told me of a custom they had there called Christmas and described it for me. This year, it seems that Japan has finally caught on it and many people are celebrating it this year. Ukyo promised to come home this year in time for Christmas and help me prepare for it. However, I just got a letter from him saying that he can't come. His ticket was sold to someone willing to pay higher, even though he had reserved it. " By then, Sora was crying again and had buried her head on Soujiro's chest. Soujiro was initially surprised, but put his arms around her small frame and tried to comfort her. They remained like that until Sora's sobs died down and her frame stopped shaking. It suddenly dawned on her, the position she was in and jerked back, away from Soujiro. "Gomen*...gomen nasai*...you just look so much like oniichan*...I...I..." Sora mumbled. "Iie*, I should be apologizing. I shouldn't have..." "Iie, you were just trying to help. You must be tired. I'll show you to your room." Sora led Soujiro to a guest room. "The spare linens are in that closet and the wash basin is on top of that." Sora then left the room quietly and solemnly. That night, Soujiro laid on the most comfortable bed he has had for a long time, staring at the ceiling, contemplating the events that had just past recently in his life. Savoring another moment in the warm sheets, he got up, off the cozy bed and picked up his sword. He sleathily slipped out of the room and walked towards the door out. He paused by Kasumi's room first. She was long asleep. Next was Sora's room. She was asleep. He could hear her shallow breath. There were still tear-stains on her cheek. 'Arigatou gozaimasu Sora-dono and Kasumi-dono. I'll get Ukyo-san home for Christmas for you. And that's yakusuku*. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The next morning, Kasumi and Sora found Soujiro's room empty. The sheets and blankets neatly folded and the wash basin clean. "I guess he left in the night," Kasumi said. She noticed the younger girl's sad face. "He's a wanderer. You know that a wanderer will never stay in a place for a long time. This was inevitable, Sora." "I know that, but he looked so much like oniichan." "Hai. It's too bad that oniichan won't join us for Christmas." Sora just groaned. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~Christmas Eve~ Sora hung some homemade ornaments on the new Christmas tree she and Kasumi cut. It filled their house with a fresh scent. Kasumi had been preparing for tomorrow morning. The aroma fromt the kitchen mingled with the tree's scent to produce a homey smell. Sora loved it, but she didn't feel content. Something was missing from this happy scene and it was Ukyo. Sora suddenly heard footsteps approaching her. She whirled around to see a figure emerge from the dark. Her fear ebbed away when she saw a familiar smiling face. "Soujiro! Where have you been?" He smiled before saying sweetly, "I have a Christmas present for you, Sora-dono." With that said, another figure stepped into the light. Sora immediately recognized him. "UKYO!" she shouted and embraced him. Kasumi ran out of the kitchen to see Sora's brother. She quickly wiped her hands on her apron and embraced him as well. "Domo arigatou gozaimasu, Souji--" Sora trailed off as Soujiro was no where to be seen. Meanwhile, at the other side of town. Soujiro had used his shukuchi to slip away while the three were reunited. He had merely shukuchied to America and found where Ukyo was staying and shukuchied him to Japan. It had taken a while and much of Soujiro's strength, but he pulled it off. The joy he brought to Sora and Kasumi was well worth the effort. He wanted no reward, for his deed was a reward in itself. Soujiro passed a group of carolers. He paused a moment to listen to them sing. "God rest you merry, gentlemen, Let nothing you dismay, Remember Christ our Saviour Was born on Christmas Day;" Soujiro face up letting the sweet snow grace his face. "To save us all from Satan's power When we were gone astray. O tidings of comfort and joy, Comfort and joy, O tidings of comfort and joy!" He thought about Shishio-san and his attempt at redemption. He thought about his ever-present grin. "From God our heavenly Father A blessed angel came; And unto certain shepherds Brought tiding of the same; How that in Bethlehem was born The Son of God by name." He thought about the reason for the joyous occasion. "Fear not, then," said the angel, "Let nothing you affright; This day is born a Saviour Of a pure virgin bright, To free all those who trust in him From Satan's power and might." 'Angel? Who was my angel?' "Now to the Lord sing praises, All you within this place, And with true love and brotherhood Each other now embrace; this holy tide of Christmas Doth bring redeeming grace." 'Where will I find redemption? Will I find it in my wanderings? Will my life as a rurouni bring me the truth?' The song was then over and the people gathered to listen all clapped. They paused before moving onto another song. Soujiro wasn't listening this time. He quietly thought about his chosen lifestyle. 'Is it useless? Null? Am I wasting my precious time doing trivial stuff? No, I was finding myself like Himura had in helping others. I am finding goodwill towards men exists and not all are cruel, like my uncle's family. Goodwill towards men exists and thrives.' Snapping out of his stupor, he caught the last verse of the song the carolers were singing. So I say a silent prayer For creatures great and small Peace on earth goodwill to men Is the greatest gift of all Peace on earth goodwill to men Is the greatest gift of all 'How ironic. Like they read my thoughts, but I can't stay.' After clapping for the carolers, he hugged his coat close once again and walked away, a geniune smile on his face. 'One foot in front of another. That's how I got here. That's how I'm going to get where ever I'm going...' ~OWARI~ Japanese Terms: hai-yes arigatou-thank you arigatou gozaimasu- thank you very much domo arigatou gozaimasu-thank you very, very much(very polite) gomen-I'm sorry gomen nasai- I'm very sorry oniichan- older(i think) brother iie-no yakusuku-a promise Thanks for reading my fic and of course, C&C is greatly welcomed. ^-^ ___________________________________________________________________ Why pay more to get Web access? 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