Verbal Match By Pan and Rurouni July 1998 The cool Hiko Seijuurou and the hot Shishio Makoto have been engaging in a battle of wits that have gone on for hours on stretch... Hiko: blah blah blah blah... hang on... BAKA DESHI! Get me some water! Baka deshi: Demo shishou... Shishio: No no, don't get it from that out-dated hitokiri, ask me for the water! Hiko: No way, yours is no better than my baka deshi's. Baka deshi: Shishou... Hiko: Why are you still here?! Didn't you hear what I say? Get-me-some-water! Kenshin: ~sulks~ But Shishio Makoto has water. Why not get it from him instead of making me walk all the way to that particular river in that particular forest... Hiko: Did I say you can walk?! You jolly well run! Shishio: Run along Battousai...lest your Shishou gets angry... Kenshin: He's always angry with me anyway... Hiko: Am I always not? Kenshin: Shishou... all right all right... I'll go... (he comes back one hour later to find Hiko and Shishio still talking to each other) Kenshin: Shishio...are you hot? (Holds a bucket of water threateningly above his head.) Shishio: Why thank you, if you do that, I can last another 15 minutes. Kenshin: What? Matte...hang on... ~goes and boil the water first~ Shishio: It makes no difference, Battousai. I'm hotter than boiling water. Kenshin: Now if you'd kindly step into the cauldron... Shishio: My my, senpai, you don't believe that I'd be so stupid would you? Kenshin: I had hoped...that some of your grey matter got burnt up... Shishio: Yours have burnt out more than mine. Hiko: In the first place, do you think he has any to burn? Shishio: Shut up. Kenshin: Well said! Hiko: Why should I keep mum and let you rattle on like a parrot, especially after the way you bite my baka deshi... Shishio: As long as I'm hungry... Hiko: But my deshi probably doesn't taste nice at all! Shishio: That's why I spat his flesh out after biting him... Kenshin: SHISHOU! SHISHIO!!!! Enough about my meat... let's... talk about something else. Shishio: Okay. Tell me how many times you've been mistaken for a girl. Hiko: You don't want to know... Shishio: Battousai...you're a sight for sore eyes...especially with your fiery hair fluttering wildly in the summer breeze... Kenshin: CUT! Let's not go in that direction! Next topic please. Hiko: That's just one of the snags for being a bishounen, baka deshi. Kenshin: *wails* But I didn't want to be born as a bishounen... Shishio: Come 'ere, Battousai. Maybe if I set you on fire, your bishounen status will be gone... Kenshin: No way! Don't you dare come any closer! I'll pull what's left of your hair out if you even take one step to...I'm serious! ~shrieks~ STAY AWAY!!! No! I don't want to be mummified! Shishio: *takes a step closer anyway* Kenshin: I... erm... Shishou? Help? Shishio: This is a bishounen's problem, Hiko, don't you come any closer. Hiko: And don't I qualify as a bishonen? [Everyone falls over in the backdrop.] The End.