PART ONE: THE WOLF CUB __________________________ CHAPTER ONE It was mid-morning on market day. The streets teemed and bustled with life. People from all stratae of society enjoyed the warm spring day. High born ladies busily inspected fine cloths and silks, housewives haggled noisily with vendors over the "freshness" of the food and filthy beggars lined the streets crying out their woes in hope of a coin or two to feed their empty stomachs. Also out in force were an element of society which had been present since time immemorial - thieves. A rather fat merchant found out the hard way when he suddenly felt twin tugs on his two money pouches. Whipping around he grabbed the two inexperienced thieves by the wrists ignoring their cries of pain. He had been robbed too many times! This time he was going to take action! He dragged the two crying pleading boys to the police station. He dumped them in front of the startled sergeant. "Can I help you Sir?" The merchant who was now rather red in the face bit out, "Yes. I would like to report an attempted theft by these two vermin here." "Yes, and what did they try to steal?" "These two money bags of mine.What the -" , the money bags were gone. The sargeant sighed. "I can hardly arrest them for attempted thef when the things you claim they tried to steal don't even exist." "Well they must have taken them while I was dragging them here then!" However after an extensive strip search of the boys (not pleasant for the police officer as the boys obviously hadn't bathed since the last time it rained) nothing was uncovered. He was getting extremely annoyed now. The shoutings of the angry merchant and the stench of the two boys had done nothing to improve his already bad move (too...much...sake...last...night...). "Well I can't hold them for thef because they don't have anything of yours and I can't hold them for attempted thef because the things you claim they attempted to steal don't seem to exist except in your mind." the policeman intoned sarcastically. "I don't care. I insist that you do something NOW!" the livid merchant yelled at the police officer. That was the last straw for the poor policeman. "Yes there is something I can do." He slipped a pair of handcuffs over the merchant's wrists. "I can arrest YOU for rudeness to a police officer. Remember you're just a filthy merchant, the lowest rank in society. Remember your place!" The two boys unnoticed, slipped out of the station. A few blocks away they arrived at the prearranged meeting place. A tall lanky boy emerged from the shadows. He was only a few years older than the little boys but his face was more guarded and enigmatic than most adults four times his age. That was why he had survived so long. His slanted eyes narrowed to a slit as he perused the frightened boys. They hadn't been scared in the police station but here standing before this twelve year old boy dressed in rags they were shivering in fright. He just had a prescence that made you think that you were about to walk into a trap. "Soooo. Did the fat merchant get arrested?" he asked nonchalently, his voice not seeming to care about the answer even though they knew very well that he did. "Yes. The police officer arrested him for insulting him," one of the boys replied. They blinked when his mouth curved up into a grin that reminded them uncomfortably of a wolf. He even had little fangs. They resisted an urge to take a step backwards. "Good. Your job is done. Here's your money." He threw some coins at them and turned to walk away. The boys grabbed eagerly at the money. It was twice as much as what was agreed upon. As they stared at the money they heard the older boys caustic voice. "Buy your mother something nice boys. And don't tell your father." Tears trickled down the boys' cheeks, creating rivulets in the dirt. How did he know? Their mother was dying. It was unlikely that she would last to see the morning. If they gave the money to their father he would just go and get drunk. Together they turned their heads to the voice but the boy had already disappeared. Kono Hajime sighed and rested his head against the wooden post. The boys thought that he had chosen them at random but he had been observing them for several days. If nothing else he was * always * prepared. It had been hard to give away the extra money but it was something he HAD to do. They reminded him too much of himself when he was younger... Pushing away the unpleasant thoughts on his momentary lapse of weakness he grinned again at the memory of the fat insolant merchant being arrested by the police. He had been watching of course. He just wanted to know how reliable the boys were. They were too innocent (ie. stupid) to lie. Perhaps he could use them again. He hadn't been able to stop his Father from selling one of his little sisters to the perverted merchant. He shuddered at what his poor sister was going through at the hands of the fat merchant and his friends. He couldn't rescue her, he had to obey his father but that didn't mean he couldn't make the merchant's life hell on earth. It had been so easy. While the merchant was distracted, HE had taken the money pouches. One of life's strange results was that the more crowded the area the easier it was to move like a shadow. It was too easy. Kono Hajime grinned wolfishly again, showing his canines. "Aho." CHAPTER TWO Hajime hated going home. How could he not when his house was a hovel, his father a brutal drunk and his mother a shadow creature who no longer even had the will to raise her voice to her husband. He kicked viciously at an unoffending stone on the street. He didn't know why was he was still here. He should have left years ago. Left them to fend for themselves. He didn't know why he stayed - he sighed, yes I do he thought. Honour, duty, loyalty. It always comes down to those three things. He knew that if it wasn't for the money he brought in, his family would have starved to death ages ago. His drunken father was no help. There was another even more compelling reason for him to stay, something which he even refused to admit to himself. Memories of an earlier, happier time, of his father teaching his only son the basic katas with a bokken, his mother happy and cheerful reading bedtime stories to him, sharing sweets with his sisters. Such memories haunted his subconscious dreams, taunting him even as they provided relief from the realities of the present. They reminded him that at one time he was Kono Hajime, son of a respected samurai not what he was now, a petty thief whose father spent all day in taverns and brothels. However memories of the past did not put food on the table or put clothes on ones back. Hajime learnt long ago that the secret of survival was to forget the past, to have no regrets, unlike his father who was stuck in his alchohol-induced memories of past glories. He slipped into his house quietly, like he did everything. Life as a thief had taught him the benefits of moving in the shadows. In this case it enabled him to leave quickly if his father was in the house so as to prevent another of his "bonding" sessions in which he would ruffle his son's hair and boast about his past victories with the sword. Hajime bore each of these torture sessions stoically, silently enduring the foul smell of alchohol which permeated his father's breath and person, so overpowering he nearly gagged. After all it was his duty as the faithful son to listen to his father but another side of his mind reasoned slyly not if you don't actually see him. Lately the voice had been whispering to him more and more, telling him things he didn't want to hear. Truths it whispered to him now, silently mocking. He glanced at his mother. As usual she was doing some household chore, cooking dinner this time. She looked like many of the other wives in the shanty town, dirty and thin, her hair scraggling over her face which was covered with bruises and cuts from her husbands' fist. She kept her eyes cast down and her body was scrunched over as if she was trying to make herself as inconspicuous as possible. Hajime walked over to his mother and put the money he had stolen into her hands. She took the bags without a word. He noticed she was careful not to touch him or to look at him. Gulping the boy tentatively reached out a hand to rest it gently against her shoulder. Like a frightened animal she skittered away from him, her arms around her as if warding off a blow. A sudden thickness developed in his throat as memories of her from the past, vital and alive picking him up and twirling him around shouting, "Fly Hajime! Fly away!" assailed him. Do you want to end up like her the voice asked him in his head. She's been beaten so many times that she acts like a frightened beast. She's no longer even your mother any more. Life and her husband have beaten her so badly that she has buried her own individuality, her own sense as a person just so she won't be hurt anymore. Is that what will happen to you someday Haj-i-i-me. Will life oppress you so badly that one-day you'll scuttle on the ground like a beetle hoping that no-one will notice you and crush you under their feet. Will you go "Yes Master anything you want Master." just so they won't beat you? Will you let your children go hungry and let them sell off your daughters as slaves just so you won't be beaten? No Hajime screamed inside his mind. I'm not like her! I'm strong! I'll never let fear and pain take away who I am! I will NEVER call anyone Master! NEVER do you hear me. I am my own Master. NO-ONE will ever tame me. I WILL command my own destiny, my own fate. No matter what they put me through I will never give in, never let fear and pain control me. I am not like my MOTHER. I will never be like her, I won't I won't so go away and stop tormenting me. She's weak I am strong. But she was once strong too...Strong enough to stand up to her husband and stop him beating Mato. Strong enough to save me in the fire that destroyed our home. Now she's too scared to even let her son touch her. Oh Gods, will I be like her someday, beaten and defeated. No, never, never, never, never,... A dirty unkempt eight year old girl flew through the door and into Hajime's arms. "Older brother! Older brother! I'm so scared!" she sobbed into his chest. "What's wrong Mato?" he asked tenderly. She looked up at him, tears making streaks in her dirt encrusted face. Now that Liki had gone, she was the only one of his three sisters left and was infinitely the most precious. While he had cared for all his sisters he loved Mato with all his heart. From the first time she had curled her little baby fingers around his own (and refused to let go for half an hour) she had occupied a special place in his heart. Maybe it was because while her older sisters were proper Japanese girls, demure and polite Mato was decidedly unproper. She was too full of life, too full of confidence to be demure. Much like her brother he thought ruefully as he hugged her close. "Older brother I'm so scared that Father will sell me next. I-I told him not to hit Mother this morning and he beat me and told me I had better learn manners or he'll take me to the market and sell me (NOTE: Would you believe this is what my grandmother used to threaten me with when I was naughty? She grew up in rural China and it was a bit difficult to fulfil the threat in Australia but it scared me when I was little : ) Now he sold Older Sister... I don't want to be a slave. They do bad things to you if you're a slave and I'll have to leave you and Mother..." At this the little girl burst into tears. Hajime cradled her close. "Don't worry Fourth sister, I'll never let anyone take you away from me OK?" Mato looked up at her brother. "Do you promise?" He smiled down at her, "Yup." "But Father..." He touched her nose lightly with one finger. "Hey when was the last time Older Brother broke one of his promises to Fourth Sister? Look I promised you that I would bring you something from the market today and here it is." With a flourish he produced a lolly (NOTE: do Japanese have lollies, do they have an equivalent?). Mato pounced on it eagerly. "Now go off and play." he laughed at her eagerness. "Do that again Older Brother?" "What Fourth Sister?" Hajime asked puzzled. "Laugh." He obliged. "You look like a scary wolf when you do that!" "Why you -" but Mato had already skipped out of the way. "You know, the other kids are scared of you because you look like a wolf when you do that but I'm not scared because I know that underneath you're just Older Brother." With that she skipped out of the room happy again. His good mood restored, the panic and the voice gone (good) Hajime remembered the other thing he had stolen today. Quelling his excitement he got a candle (it was getting dark) and went to the outside lavatories. The smell was horrendous but Hajime pushed it out of his mind. He found that he could endure anything no matter how horrible as long as he remained focused on his purpose. It was unlikely that anyone would question a candle burning here for extended periods of time and no-one was likely to be snooping around casually. It was the perfect hiding place as long as one could endure the smell. Hajime went behind the lavatory. Glancing around to make sure no-one was around he carefully dug at a memorized spot. In it was a small pouch of coins which Hajime added to now. He knew that his mother would give all the money to his father who would promptly waste it on drink and whores. For the past year he had been taking money out of his daily takings, not too much to be suspicious and hiding it here. THIS was the money which fed them and clothed them. His mother knew that he must hide the money somewhere but his father never caught on so he had never asked his wife. This was fortunate as she would have told him her suspicions just as she gave him the money meant for food for him to drink away without question. She was took beaten, too weak. I will NEVER be like that. NEVER. I will never call anyone master, Hajime swore fiercely. In the hole was his treasure. Wrapped in cloth it was an old children's book. Hajime had been learning to read and write when they had come to this shanty town. Though no-one taught him now he took all opportunites to further his knowledge of characters, spying on classes when he had the time, reading anything he could see, signs, pieces of scrap paper. He had been unable to finish this book when he first came here but for several years now he had read it so many times he had memorized it. He could have stolen other books but there was nowhere to hide them and besides this was his favourite. For some strange reason, the words sang to him taking him away from his miserable existence. He WAS the samurai in the story searching for the demon who had terrorized the town. However the book was only the first volume. Today he had finally found the second! He was going to know how it finished after all! His hands trembling he opened the book he had hidden in his clothes. His brow furrowed as the samurai after killing the demon found that there was another in town! It had not done any harm but he swore upon his honour that he would find the demon and kill it. Demons were supposed to have the ability to shapeshift but with the help of a Shinto priest they located the demon. Hajime's heart stopped as the demon turned out to be the samurai's wife! He loved her above all else on earth but he had made his vow and he was honour-bound to fulfill it. His wife pleaded with him saying that she had never hurt anyone, she hadn't meant to trick him but she loved him so much and this was the only way they could be together. When she realized that the words weren't getting through to her husband she begged him not to kill the children for though they carried her blood they were innocents. The samurai turned to the priest and the lord of the han. The priest said, "Demons are evil. Evil must be killed wherever it is found, no matter what form it takes, no matter what the cost to yourself there is." The lord agreed saying. "Evil must be killed. Aku Suku Zan." "So the samurai killed his wife and children as they were demons and therefore evil even though they had never hurt anyone. For where evil is found it must be killed quickly even if the person is someone you love. For that is the path of the true warrior and the path of the Gods. Aku Suku Zan." Suddenly a scream pierced the air. Recognizing the voice, Hajime started. He dropped the book and ran towards his house. In his panic he never noticed a piece of paper falling out of the cover of the book. It was handwritten and was an alternative ending to the story. "The samurai loved his wife and children too much to kill them and they ran away together and lived happily ever after. For that is the path of Love and long after the path of warriors and Gods is forgotten the path of Love will still endure for it is the only one which brings happiness." CHAPTER THREE Hajime ran to the front of the depilated shack he called home. At first all he saw was a tall muscular man dressed in plain cotton travelling clothes. Behind him he could see several other similarly dressed men. However what he froze his mind was the group of twenty or so crouched on the ground. Most of them were young girls, a couple were boys. All were dressed in rags and even to a slum dweller like Hajime the stench coming from their bodies was almost unbearable. Slavers... Hajime glared at his father who was talking to a short plump man dressed in rich silk robes. A slaver. He scowled in reflexive disgust. He hated slavers. They were the lowest of the low, the scum of society who fed off the misery of others. When he was grown-up he swore silently to himself any slaver who had the misfortune to cross his path would see be an ex-slaver. Ex as in dead. Hajime skidded to a halt. Then he saw her. One of the slavers' guards was holding the struggling Mato in his arms, with one hand over her mouth. He yelped as she sunk her sharp teeth into the soft flesh. Hajime couldn't help but smile inwardly, Mato was a handful under the best of circumstances. That was why he loved her. Cursing the guard held her away from him and backhanded her across the face. Hajime saw red. His eyes narrowing into dangerous slits he ran up to the man holding his sister captive. Grabbing a nearby block of wood he slammed it with all his strength into the man's stomach screaming, "Let my sister go!" The guard dropped Mato who promptly kicked him in the groin. He sank to the ground under the combined attack. However before the two siblings could land any more blows another one of the guards caught Mato. Hajime felt someone pick him up by the back of his gi. "Let me go! Let me go!" he screamed struggling furiously against his attacker. He had to save Mato! "Silence you idiot boy." his captor yelled at him. At the sound of the familiar voice and the stench of alcohol, Hajime let his body go limp. Years of conditioning on family duty and honour meant that he had never actively disobeyed his father. Satisfied that his son had calmed down, Kono Saga set the boy back down onto the ground. He smiled at the slaver, revealing his yellowed teeth. As usual his breath stank of alcohol and his eyes were red from lack of sleep. "Well Fujiwara-san. I'm sure this girl," he waved at Mato who was now bound hand and foot and gagged, " - will more than cover those gambling debts." The slaver sniffed. "Well Kono you're lucky to get off so lightly this time. But be careful this is your last daughter and your wife is not very saleable. Next time you get into debt like that you won't have anything to bail you out." Konou just grinned. "Well I have my loyal son here to help me out." he said proudly putting a hand on Hajime's shoulder. The boy's hands curled up into fists. The slaver was an expert in reading people. He sniffed "I don't think that your * loyal * son likes you very much Konou." "Of course he likes me." Konou looked surprised and hurt. "After all I am his father and we men have to stick together, right son?" Hajime remained silent. "What about your daughter?" Konou snorted. "She's just another bothersome female. Not worth anything. Not like us men heh son?" Hajime couldn't take it any longer. His fingernails bit into the flesh of his palms, drawing blood. He tore out of his father's grasp. "Father! How could you sell Mato like that? Take her back now!" His whole body was trembling. This was the first time he had stood up to his father, the man who ever since he could walk and talk he had been conditioned to look up to as a demi-god the ultimate authority even if was a drunk worthless coward. A look of shock came over his father's face. A shock that was quickly replaced by righteous fury. How dare his son question his authority like that and in front of an audience too! The slaver was now snickering audiably! He did something he had never done before, he hit his son, his beloved son, the boy who was the light of his life, his last hope to redeem his lost honour. Hajime fell to the ground. Looking up at his father with those strange amber eyes he slowly wiped the blood from his mouth. His eyes met Mato's. Help me Big Brother, they pleaded. You promised me that no-one would ever take me away. You promised me... With a cry he ran towards his sister and then his world slid into darkness as he met his father's fist. Ohhhh. Hajime groaned as he regained consciousness. Urk. Morning. Oh well, time to go and steal more money. Hmmm is it market-day... Suddenly the memories hit him. Mato! Sold to slavers! Screaming at his father for the first time in his life. Being knocked unconscious. No! He had to go save Mato. He leaped out of bed. It was still dark. He couldn't have been knocked out that long. He still had a chance to find her. He didn't know what he would do if he did but he would think of something. After all wasn't he the ever-resourceful and cunning Kono Hajime? He was about to run out of the house when a voice behind him spoke. "Don't bother son. You've been out for a whole day. The slave caravan left the town immediately after you went to sleep. They could be anywhere by now." Hajime slowly turned around. His father was sitting by the fire, clutching a bottle of sake to his chest. He drank in the rare sight of his father at home instead of in a tavern or at the casino or in the local whorehouse. He looked old and gray and defeated as if he had just saw a truth that he had refused to admit before. Five years ago I lost my honour because of my weaknesses, he thought. Sake, gambling, women. I lost all my money so I brought my family to live here in the slums. My wife that I loved, my beloved son and my daughters. I lost everything, my honour my ancestral home, my only comforts were those things which were my downfall. Afraid to admit that I was a failure I sort to assuage my pride by beating my wife and seeking respect and obediance from my son. So that I could still feel like a man. Now I realize that my son, my beloved son who I hoped will redeem a little of my lost honour, hates and despises me. Has always hated me. Those things which I did to try to gain his respect were the very things which drove him away. The worse thing is he is right to despise and hate me. I am nothing more than a coward, a coward with no honour. Hajime just stood there, gazing at his father through narrow amber eyes. The older man met his gaze unflinchingly. His eyes were also amber, but whilst his son's was sharp and piercing, the father's eyes were bloodshot and cloudy. Hajime never realized how much his father looked like him. The same eyes, the same hair with the lone strands which fell over his eyes, the same harsh angular face, the same lean wide shouldered build. It was as if he was looking at himself 30 years into the future, a future self bloated with drink and gluttony. A weak coward with no honour besides the delusions who held in his drunken mind. No honour at all. Suddenly he realized that something was missing. "Where's mother." he asked his father, his voice carefully controlled, the words sharp and precise. The older man laughed. "Mother? Oh I killed her." He brought the sake bottle to his lips. Suddenly he saw the body on the ground. She looked like she was sleeping except that her neck was twisted into an impossible angle. "Oh I killed the bitch. Found that she had been hiding money from me all this time. Found the money outside near the lavatory. No respect for her husband, no respect at all. First my son then my wife, no respect, no respect...Killed her with my own hands, my wife..no respect..." Hajime paled in horror as he remembered that in his haste to reach the front of the shack he had forgotten to hide the money and books. Oh no... In his shock he didn't even notice the sake bottle in his father's hands drop to the ground and shatter or the older man bury his face in his trembling hands. Gone they're all gone... His hands clenched into fists he rounded onto his father. "Why? WHY? WHY?!!" he screamed. "Honour. No-one respects me. Not my own son, not my wife..." Hajime grabbed his father's gi. "You call this honour?" "Try to teach you...Honour...my honour..." The boy screamed. "I spit on your honour! I don't need your honour! Do you hear me? I reject YOUR honour! I'll find MY own honour! The only honour I'll accept now is my own and no-one elses!" He began shaking his father furiously. The older man didn't even fight back. With a scream of fustration he dropped the man back onto the ground. He shook with the effort of getting himself back into control. "I reject the name of Kono. I reject my father's name as it has no honour." His father flinched. "From now on I will be known by my mother's family name." His eyes narrowed. "From now on my name is not Kono Hajime but Saitou Hajime." Trembling with barely contained fury he grasped the table for support. On it was the bag of money and the books he had hidden. The words at the end of the book flooded his mind. Evil. Evil must be killed wherever it is found...no matter what the cost to yourself ...Evil...Evil must be killed...Evil...The path of the true warrior...Aku Suku Zan. Like a zombie he walked to his father's pallet. He opened the box next to it. It was the only thing from happier times that his father had kept. In the box were the traditional pair of swords worn by the samurai. Even though his father hadn't used them for five years, he still kept them well-oiled and as sharp as the day they were made. Memories drifted through his mind. He saw a much younger version of himself reaching for the katana which was kept in the family shrine. Suddenly something lifted him up from behind. Strong gentle hands tickled him mercilessly. "Stop it Father!" he laughed as his beloved Father gave him the "tickle torture". He was put down gently on the ground. Father knelt down so that his face was next to his son's. "Father. What's that?" he lisped pointing to the gleaming blade. His Father smiled, 'That my little Hajime is the Konou family blade. It is our family treasure and has been in our line for hundreds of years. It represents all our honour. " Suddenly he made a scary face. "You know they said that they used to use it to kill demons." Little Hajime gasped in awe. "Wow, demons." Demons, evil, kill were the thoughts running through Saitou Hajime, formerly Kono Hajime's mind as he stared at the gleaming metal blade in his hand. Evil, must be killed no matter what the cost. The path of honour, the path of the true warrior. Aku Soku Zan. Carrying the katana he advanced on his father. "You are evil. You killed Mother. You broke her spirit. You sold all your daughters into slavery to feed your drunken gluttony. You have no honour." His Father made no move to rebut him. Hajime continued speaking in his soft dead voice. "Evil must be killed. This is the path of honour, the path of the true warrior," he recited as if by rote. He stood next to the inert form of the older man who made no move to fight or to escape. He bowed his head in mute acceptance of his fate. Hajime raised the katana above his father's neck. "Aku Soku Zan!" He brought the gleaming metal down. Ignoring the blood splattered all over him and the head now rolling on the ground, Saitou Hajime dropped the sword in his hand. It fell to the dirt ground with a soft thud. Turning away he walked out of the shack, never to return. The forest outside of town gained a reputation of being haunted that night. Loud wails and sobs echoed through the houses near the forest all night. People shivered in their beds, put spirit wards on their doors and covered their ears to try to block out the sounds of grief and despair. Not one of them slept a wink that night. When dawn came the sounds were gone. People came out of their houses in relief to greet the dawn. All agreed that the sounds during the night were inhuman. A ghost they said, the ghost of a maiden maybe, pining for her lost love. "They're wrong." whispered an old man whom everyone dismissed as being old and senile. "It was a wolf, a wolf howling to the moon for all that he had lost." CHAPTER FOUR "Come in!" the tall lanky young man greeted his four guests. Hikaru Seiwa's father had been an extremely wealthy merchant. Hikaru had been his only son and heir. Upon his father's death he had received a fortune, more than enough money to satisfy his "tastes" and to make sure that they remained hidden. The combined power and influence of his four guests made sure that he could act virtually without fear of the law. All they asked in return were a few monetary "gifts" and the opportunaty to share in his - pleasures. As the five men entered the stately manor no-one noticed the golden eyes watching them from the shadows. The fat one was the chief magistrate of Aizu, the one with the pointed beard was a member of the Shogun's family, the dandy was the son of the head of the army, the portly one was a senior police man. Saitoh Hajime knew their names, where they worked, where they lived - what their preferences were. He had been watching them for nearly two weeks now as they were the most regular visitors to the house where he had finally tracked down his sister. Over a year now. Over a year on the hunt following a trail that was always cold. After - that night, finding his sister was the only thing he could think of. Her eyes, accussing and frightened haunted his dreams. *You promised to protect me Big Brother. You promised...* She was the only thing that he had left of his old life. Yes once he found her...well he didn't know what exactly they would do, but at least they would be together. Learning to hunt for his food, camping alone in the countryside, sleeping in alleys were uncomfortable but they were only physical annoyances and as such could be easily ignored. The worse part of the past year was the watching or more specifically the places where he had to watch. Fujiwara had specialized in selling children because they were extremely profitable in the right markets and Hajime had to watch their torment day after day. In the worse places he sometimes prayed that he wouldn't find his sister because if he did it meant that she...After over a year of watching, he had grown somewhat desensitized to the suffering, at least he no longer threw up. However the worse part was that most of the men who enjoyed the "pleasures" were basically immune from the law because of their wealth and influence. Hajime's hands unconsciously twisted into fists as he watched government officials and other important men being paid off to ignore what was before their eyes. A cold burning anger settled into his heart everytime he saw it happen. It was the same feeling that had overwhelmed him on - that night. They were just like his father and even his mother. His parents and the officials were supposed to *protect* those weaker than themselves, him, his sisters, those children and yet for the sake of some drinks or money or simply because they were too weak of spririt they had let him and all those children suffer. The more he watched the deeper the anger settled into his heart until it seemed as if it had always been part of him. He had been watching for two weeks now but he still he couldn't see his sister. He was so certain that she was here. He didn't like moving out of the shadows, it was easier to watch under the cover of darkness, but now he had no other choice. From a lifetime of experience in petty burgulary, Hajime deftly jumped down from the roof and into the courtyard below. He heard sounds of merriment - and screams. The beast in his heart woke momentarily but he quickly settled it down. Now was no time to draw attention to himself. Silently he started searching... Damn it. He couldn't find her! There was no sign of her at all! Suddenly he heard a sound in the shadows behind him. His heart beating with trepidation and fear, he grasped the dagger he always carried at his side and turned around. A small dirty figure emerged from the shadows. Hajime sighed with relief as he realized it was just one of the servants. She - well at least he thought it was a she, it was difficult to tell with all the dirt covering her face, looked to be about 9 years old, the same age as Mato. She was dressed in filthy stinking rags and looked half-starved. However even worse were the scars covering her face. From what he had seen over the past year, he was sure that her body was even worse. Sheathing his dagger he took a step towards the child. Almost instinctively she cringed backwards, raising her arms about her face as if she was expecting a blow - or worse. The muscles in Hajime's jaw tightened. He held out his hands placatingly. "Look, I'm not going to hurt you OK." He spoke in a soft gentle voice, much as what one would use to calm a frightened animal. Gradually after much coaxing the girl began to relax her stance, though the expression on her face still showed her distrust. Almost reluctantly she looked up at him. Her eyes...they looked so much like his sister was all Hajime could think about. Could she be...No it was impossible! He knew his sister. She would never give up! She would always fight! She was like him, strong and proud. This...fightened animal could *not* be his sister. Upon seeing his face, the girl jumped back in terror. She dropped to the ground, her body curved into a ball, her face hidden in her arms. Worried, Hajime tried to coax her to stand up but to no avail. All he could get from her was animal-like sounds of distress and pain. He could make out only a couple of words. "Promise...market..." Eventually he gave up in fustration and left the house. His sister had to be here! She had to. He would find her, all he needed to do was wait and Saitou Hajime was *very* good at waiting. Hajime breathed in the cold crisp air of early morning. Though it was market-day, it was so early that only a few intrepid entrepreneurs had yet set up their stalls. He loved the dawn. There are two types of loneliness he thought to himself. The loneliness of the night when you are all alone in the middle of nowhere, when you realize that there is no-one who cares whether you lived or died. Even worse however is when you realize this in the midst of a crowd. Where everywhere you look you see people laughing, talking, holding hands, touching. Hajime smiled wryly to himself, even worse than being touched by the darkness in the shadows of the abyss was to be the darkness in the light of heaven. But at dawn, there was sufficent light to drive away the shadows that haunted him at night, yet not enough light to remind him that the source of the shadows was himself... He shook his head. Where did those thoughts come from he wondered? Darkness, light, loneliness what rubbish. I just like the dawn because because well I do that's all. I am NOT lonely. I don't need anyone. I of all people should know that you can't trust anyone but yourself. An image of his father's head rolling along the ground flashed through his mind, his mother's broken twisted body... A sudden sound drew him out of his revere. Was that a muffled scream? The sound of sword-fighting? Curious, Hajime moved silently towards the source of the disturbance. A year of hunting wild animals in the forests of Japan enabled him to creep up to the fighters without being noticed. He hid behind a conveniant stack of boxes as his mind quickly assessed the situation. They were in a narrow alleyway. From the sight of the girl in her nightclothes tied hand and foot and gagged, this was obviously a kidnapping gone wrong. His conclusion was reinforced once him saw the fighters. There were two distinct groups, one was dressed in uniforms similar to those worn by retainers of rich families, obviously the girl's guards. The other group were dressed in the rough simple clothes of commoners but their sword skills were obviously superior to those in the more expensive clothes. Probably a group of masterless samurai, honourless ones too as they would be the only ones to try something like this. Strangely enough the ones near the girl seemed to be sporting black eyes. They moved funnily too, as if someone had just kneed them in an unmentionable area. The guards were being mowed down by the kidnappers. There was very little time left for Hajime to make a decision. What should he do? Should he help the girl or should he just leave her to her fate? After all its not like I can do anything is it? Everyone is twice as big as I am and anyway I don't even know *how* to use a sword. The martial arts had never held much interest for the young Hajime. The few sword fights he had seen where between his father and some of his drinking friends. They were all blind drunk and the fights had mainly consisted of them swinging blindly at each other with their swords, occassionally getting the lucky hit in. He had never seen how such a barbarish unrefined technique could help him support his family. What was he supposed to do, beat-up stall owners in a protection racket? As for protection - the best way to get out of trouble he found was to run. The truth was the only things which interested him were those things which helped him to achieve his goals and his mind alone was more than sufficient for the task. Anyway, it was so much *fun* making up complex and convoluted traps and then watching people walk into them... Even if had wanted to learn, there was no-one to teach him. His father was nothing more than a drunk and he could hardly run off and join a dojo when he had a whole family to feed. There was something else as well - after *that* night, everytime he touched a katana, everytime he felt the sharp metal blade balance in his grip he could see *him*, his head rolling on the ground, the eyes which were so much like his own staring back at him, glassed over with death. As always Hajime pushed the darkness down into his subconscious, the darkness which haunted his dreams, that was only banished by the light of his dreams of what would happen once he found Mato. They would be simple farmers ekking out a living in a town where no-one knew of their past. She would find a sweetheart and as for him - maybe he would find someone too. They would be together, no more loneliness no more darkness or swords. However there were more important things at hand than his own nightmares or dreams. He as well as the kidnappers knew that there would be no police coming to the rescue. In such lawless times as this, it was every man for himself. Nearly every official was corrupt. The beast growled softly as he recalled his first-hand experiences of such corruption. The police were often the criminals. Own looked after own, it was the only way for families to survive, no-one would fault him if he just forgot what he saw and ran away but then again he didn't really have a family anymore to protect did he? Great what a time to develop a conscience. What could he do, he could hardly fight them? Suddenly he remembered something he saw while sitting on the street and a smile spread over his face. A smile which said clearly that someone was soon going to be in a world of pain because Saitou Hajime had a plan. That's the last one, the chief kidnapper thought as his katana sliced through the soft belly of the last guard. They had better move soon before more of them came. He motioned one of his lackeys to pick up the unconscious girl. Lord Okita would pay handsomely for her return. Even if he didn't care for his ward, he was bound by honour to protect her. He loved "working" with the old samurai families, their sense of honour and duty made them so predictable and so easy to manipulate. Hajime peered down the alley. The girl had been put down carefully in a recessed doorway that opened onto the alley. It meant that she wasn't going to get hurt from what he was about to do. After all what was the use of killing the girl you were trying to rescue? Almost casually he threw the cigarette he "borrowed" onto the straw. "Ahhhhh!" "What?!" the head kidnapper screamed. The last thing he and the rest of this band saw were the crazed rolling eyes of the horses as they ran frantically down the alley desperately trying to escape the blazing inferno that used to be a cart of hay attached to their backs. Once he was sure that all the kidnappers were either dead or at least severely injured either by flames or hard hooves he cautiously approached the unconscious form of the girl he just rescued. Seeing she was still unconscious (the nasty bruise on her forehead told the whole story) he drew his dagger and quickly set about cutting the ropes around her feet and hands. "Arrggggg!" he screamed as he felt a small hard fist punch his right eye and something hard - probably a brick smash him on the head. Then he couldn't make any sound at all as something hit him in *that* spot between his legs. Strangely enough as he collapsed to the ground in agony the only thing he could think of was "Oh well at least I now know how those men got their bruises." When he recovered sufficiently to emit sounds (though he still held his hands protectively in front of that part of his anatomy which had just been so roughly abused) he cried, "I was trying to rescue you you damn idiot!" It was meant to come out as a menacing snarl, however since he was not yet fully recovered from his ahem "injury" it sounded more like a high-pitched squeal. "Oh no! I did it again!" The girl gasped and held her hand to her mouth. "I am *so* sorry. Please forgive me!" "What?! Forgive - ?" At that moment Hajime looked up and saw *her*. She's so beautiful... To make things worse she was smiling too, smiling at *him*. Gold eyes met green. Neither of them said anything for long moments. Say something say anything, his brain screamed. Where's that quick mind of yours, that wit that your always so proud of? Say something! "Eeeep." was all that came out. She groaned. "I did hit you on the head too hard. I hope I didn't do any permanent damage. Great. Sou-ni always said I was too impetuous for *other* people's good. Can you stand?" Grabbing his arm she helped him to his feet. "Thank you for rescuing me. My name is Takagi Tokio of Aizu by the way. What's yours?" "Um, Saitou Hajiii - " At this point he lost consciousness. CHAPTER FOUR v2 Nightfall. Golden eyes gleamed in the darkness. The eyes were almost feral in appearance but even more disturbing was the sense of cold clinical calculation behind the wild passions revealed in those eyes. The object of his gaze was a richly appointed house on the opposite side of the street. It was the house which he had spent a year tracking down, a house where innocence was violated to feed the sick appetites of men, men which Saitou Hajime knew like he knew himself after spending a year watching them. Powerful and rich they used their influence and money to make sure that they were never brought to justice for their evil. He stepped out of the shadows. Though he was only thirteen, his face had already lost the roundness of childhood. The suffering he had seen, the long nights watching or alone on the road had weathered away what little was left of his childhood and innocence. This was something even he did not realize. His father abandoned and betrayed him and his family for the false paradise offered by sake. The officials abandoned and betrayed the children, the people they were supposed to protect for riches, the fool's paradise. However this was part of Hajime's subconscious, the nightmares that haunted him at night. All his conscious mind knew was that everytime he saw a "transaction" take place the cold burning anger, the beast within that was awoken that fateful night a year ago settled further and further into his soul. The part of him that kept him from abandoning himself to the beast was the memory of his sister's face, glowing with happiness. The warmth of the memory drove away the beasts which haunted his mind on those cold lonely nights alone in the woods. He would see her smile again, he would vow as he shivered besides the inadequately small fire, his stomach empty, the sounds of wild beasts surrounding him. There were always plenty of beasts, waiting to eat him - unless he killed them first but never another human soul. He was always alone and sometimes on those long nights he wondered whether it would always be that way. No, he would find her and they would be together again. He would have *someone* again. And the beast within would be driven away by the fire and warmth of her smile. He would find her. He would find her tonight. With a graceful silence born of a lifetime of petty thievery he slipped into the courtyard in the back of the house. Once inside the thick walls he could clearly hear the screams coming from the "party" inside. However a year of hearing similar cries of pain had to some extent inured him to the suffering. Which was why he didn't throw up as he watched the "party". However he felt the beast stir again, growling softly from its hiding place in his soul, waiting for another chance to take him. No he whispered softly to himself. Never again. After that night a year ago he had wandered away from the town in a daze, not noticing where he was going. Fortunately it was night so no-one saw the boy, staggering almost drunkenly along the street, covered head to toe with blood. Until *they* saw him. A group of children walking back from some midnight expedition. The first thing he noticed were the childish screams of fear. Then the look on their faces. "Monster!" "It's a demon!" "Bad thing!" "Monster! Evil!" "I'm frightened mummy!" In panic he grabbed one of the children. "Shut up! Shut up!" he shrieked, putting his hand over the child's mouth. Everyone did shut up. All he could hear were soft frightened sobs which tore at his fragile mind more than their loudest cries could. He looked down at the little girl he was holding in his arms. She was about 8, Mato's age. Her eyes gazed back at him in fear. Please don't kill me they begged. 'She thinks I'm going to kill her? Do I really look like such a monster to them?' "I'm sorry," he had whispered and let her go. However whilst he was holding her the blood which covered him had smeared all over her. Once she noticed the red fluid covering her face, her dress she started screaming and screaming and screaming. His face as white as death, Hajime ran. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'M SORRY!" he shrieked as he ran and ran and ran. Somehow he ended up in the woods, besides the river. The full moon gleamed in the cloudless sky, flooding the world below with its radiant etheral light. Staring into the river, Hajime could see himself, the spectre that had terrified the children so much. The blood that covered him. But even worse was the look in his eyes. The look of a wild beast - not mindless and brutal but with the force of a cold emotionless cunning behind it. A demon. "Aku.Soku.Zan." 'But he deserved it didn't he? I only did what was right, didn't I...The feel of the katana in his hands, the sharp blade tearing through flesh and bone. The head rolling on the ground, those sightless eyes staring back at him...Who was the true demon - the samurai or the wife?' With a cry he fell to his knees. Even though the water in the river was ice-cold he washed himself over and over again and still it wasn't enough to clean the stain away. I'll never kill again, he swore silently to himself as he realized what he had become - and that now he was truly alone. All alone. He pushed the beast down, like he always did. Tonight he could not afford to attract attention to himself. He had to find her. She wasn't at the "party" (he was almost thankful for that). However the problem was she didn't seem to anywhere else either. Hours later he still couldn't find her. She had to be here. She *had* to be. He wasn't going to give up. He knew that she was here, somewhere. He would come back night after night until he found her. "Mato I *will* find you." he said softly. Suddenly he heard a small sound coming from the shadows behind him. His heart beating with trepitidion and fear he grabbed the dagger he always kept at his side and twirled around, ready to face his assailant. However what emerged from the shadows was a bundle of rags. On closer inspection Hajime realized that it was a child, or what remained of one. Yes it was still alive that is to say,the heart went about its motions and the blood still flowed, but the spirit, the fire was gone. All that was left was the flesh, an empty shell with no soul. He could see the scars covering her face even through the layers of dirt encrusted on her skin. >From previous experience he knew that the scars on her body where probably even worse and the scars on her soul... Sheathing his knife he held out his hands placatingly, making soft gentle cooing noises, like what one would use to calm a frightened animal but to no avail. The child would not uncoil from the ball she had wrapped herself in and all he could get out of her were a few words. "Promise... market..." Hajime sighed. She was not the first such case he had seen in his travels and probably not the last. At first he had nightmares of finding his sister like this, a cowering frightened animal, her spirit broken by constant pain and degradation. However, he knew, he told himself that Mato would never end up like this. Her spirit was too bright, her will to live too strong. She was like him, she would never stop fighting like that day when they took her away. He looked sadly at the child at his feet. He knew he couldn't do anything for her now. He hoped that she found relief in death soon. With that he left the house as silently as he came. The dawn saw a certain amber-eyed boy sitting on a cart filled with hay munching away contently on some "borrowed" fruit. Suddenly he froze as the sound of sword-fighting reached his ears. Everyone else in the square quickly moved away from the alley where the noise was coming from. In these lawless days, own looking after own was the only way to survive. To help a stranger was to court disaster for one's family. 'Oh well, its not like I *have* a family to protect.' A year of hunting for his food in the wilds of Japan allowed Hajime to sneak up on the combatants almost unnoticed. He hid behind some conveniently placed boxes stacked along one of the walls of the alley. From the sight of the small figure gagged and tied hand and foot it was obviously a kidnapping gone wrong. This conclusion was further reinforced by the clothes worn by the combatants. One group wore the armour common among the retainers of powerful samurai families. They were obviously the girl's guards. The others however were dressed in simple peasant robes. However the way they wielded their swords - they were cutting down the more impressive looking guards down easily. Ronin then, thought Hajime. Honourless ones too otherwise they would never have tried to pull off a stunt like this. Strange though, a few of them were sporting black eyes? They were walking funnyily too as if they were in a great deal of pain between the legs. Don't you try to slash open people with swords, not give them black eyes? It was obvious that the good guys weren't going to last much longer. If he was going to do something it had better be soon. Just leave, his inner voice of caution told him. No-one will think less of you if you just walk away. No-one else not even the police are doing anything. You will lose honour in no-one's eyes - except my own. With that last thought Hajime closed his eyes and leaned his head against the wall. Great, now there was *no-way* to get out of helping. Me and my "honour". Someday its going to get me killed. He grinned. I don't care either. Better to die with honour then to end up like my honourless father or my weakling of a mother. Now decided, he turned the full force of his mind to the problem. What the hell am I supposed to do anyway? Its not like I know *how* to fight. Why didn't you learn then nagged his inner voice. Maybe because my father was always too drunk to teach me and if I left to find a master my family would have starved. It just never seemed well useful and what's the use in learning something which doesn't contribute to your ulimate goals. Which was? Well to feed my family. But you goal now is to rescue that girl. So, look I'm only thirteen years old. Even if I had spent the last few years of my life devoted to sword-fighting (which I didn't) do you really think I could take on those ronin over there? My mind has managed to get me out of most situations before... So what brilliant plan which doesn't involve fighting have you come up with now? Well, remember what I was sitting on this morning.... That's the last one, the chief kidnapper thought as his katana sliced through the soft belly of the last guard. They had better move soon before more of them came. He motioned one of his lackeys to pick up the unconscious girl. Lord Okita would pay handsomely for her return. Even if he didn't care for his ward, he was bound by honour to protect her. He loved "working" with the old samurai families, their sense of honour and duty made them so predictable and so easy to manipulate. Hajime peered down the alley. The girl had been put down carefully in a recessed doorway that opened onto the alley, out of the way of the fighting. Why damage the goods unnnecessarily? He had noticed that in the first few minutes of arriving at the scene. It was good as it meant that she wasn't going to get hurt from what he was about to do. After all what was the use of killing the girl you were trying to rescue? Almost casually he threw the cigarette he "borrowed" onto the straw. "Ahhhhh!" "What?!" the head kidnapper screamed. The last thing he and the rest of this band saw were the crazed rolling eyes of the four horses as they ran frantically down the alley desperately trying to escape the blazing inferno that used to be a cart of hay attached to their backs. Once he was sure that all the kidnappers were either dead or severely injured either by the flames or by hard hooves he cautiously approached the unconscious form of the girl he just rescued. 'I hope that those horses don't set the entire town alight.' He shrugged mentally. 'Oh well such is life. There's nothing I can do about it now so why bother worrying about it?' Seeing she was still unconscious (the nasty bruise on her forehead told the whole story) he drew his dagger and quickly set about cutting the ropes around her feet and hands. "Arrggggg!" he screamed as he felt a small hard fist punch his right eye and something even harder - probably a brick smash him on the head. Then he couldn't make any sound at all as something hit him in *that* spot between his legs. Strangely enough as he collapsed to the ground in agony the only thing he could think of was 'Oh well at least I now know how those men got their bruises.' When he recovered sufficiently to emit sounds (though he still held his hands protectively in front of that part of his anatomy which had just been so roughly abused) he cried out, "I was trying to rescue you you damn idiot!" It was meant to come out as a menacing snarl, however since he was not yet fully recovered from his "injury" it sounded more like a high-pitched squeal. "Oh no! I did it again!" The girl gasped and held her hand to her mouth. "I am *so* sorry. Please forgive me!" "What?! You expect me to just - ?" At that moment Hajime looked up and saw *her*. She's so beautiful...oh gods she was smiling, smiling at *him*. Gold eyes met green. Say something say anything, his brain screamed. Where's that quick mind of yours, that wit that your always so proud of? Say something! "Eeeep." was all that came out. She groaned. "I did hit you on the head too hard. I hope I didn't do any permanent damage. Great. Sou-ni always said I was too impetuous for *other* people's good. Can you stand?" Grabbing his arm she helped him to his feet. "Thank you for rescuing me. My name is Takagi Tokio of Aizu by the way. What's yours?" "Um, Saitou Hajiii - " At this point he lost consciousness. NOTES: This is just *my* interpretation of what *might* have happened to make Saitou the person he is in "Kenshin" so please don't insult me too much if you find my story totally abhorrent. This is a major rewrite of the original chapter which I hated because the writing style was so icky. Some people may think that the scene after he killed his father is OOC but one does not change from a 12 year old kid whose never even been in a fight before let alone hold a sword to the type of character Saitou is as an adult. Anyway I thought that something like this might explain why Saitou is so contemptuous of Kenshin's vow not to kill. Anyway the bit about Saitou not liking sword-fighting...I don't think that Saitou is the sort of character to learn sword-fighting for the sake of it. He *always* has a goal in mind when he does something. But then again this is all just what I think so everyone is welcome to disagree! CHAPTER FOUR He was wild. That was the only word that she could use to describe him. Tokio sat on the edge of her bed staring curiously at the unconscious boy. What was his name again? Hajime? Mmm a strong name for a strong character. It suited him. As a "little lady" she was confined to the house most of the time. Lord Okita was often away on business and her guardian was extremely traditional and set in his ways especially in his opinion of how girls should behave. So the only people she saw regularly were Lady Okita, Sou-ni and the servants. Like her their features were delicate and refined. She giggled. Sou-ni looked almost like a girl sometimes! She frowned as a bad memory came to mind. Besides Sou-ni this was the first child she'd met since coming here. Cocking her head curiously she mentally compared the two. Sou-ni had delicate features set in a heart-shaped face with melting blue eyes. This wild boy well his features could hardly be called beautiful. They were long and angular with the chiselled bones making harsh lines. She shivered as she remembered his eyes. The narrowed lines, the striking gold colour, she was reminded of.....a wolf? She giggled again. A wild wolf boy! Wolf-chan! Wild. Mmmm. Smiling she loosened the ribbon tying her hair. The long black strands fell down her back. Lady Okita was always trying to get her to keep her hair tied up "like a proper lady" but she wore it down as much as possible just to spite them. With her hair down she felt almost.....free from the stifling constraints of being a "proper" Japanese girl. Grinning mischievously she got an idea. It wasn't entirely proper but when had she ever been worried about that? She leaned over the boy to get a better look at his fascinating features. She placed one small hand tentatively on his cheek noting how the deep brown of his skin contrasted with the soft whiteness of hers. She slowly stroked the harsh jutting bones. He was just so interesting! She wondered if he would want to be her friend. Then she'd have someone to play with instead of being lonely all the time especially now that Sou-ni. Her hand tightened on the boy's face, waking him up. His eyelids fluttered opened. Suddenly she was staring into those strangely compelling golden amber eyes..... Hajime slowly opened his eyes. A strange fluttering sensation on his face disturbing his slumber. He woke to look straight up into the greenest eyes that he had ever seen. The girl's long hair surrounded him like a fragrant black curtain and he could smell her scent - jasmine. A small draft blew through the room and long thick strands of hair flickered lightly over his face. Her features were delicate and beautiful but it was the mischievous set to her face that he found strangely compelling. As if she was a wild nymph ready to play some strange prank on some unsuspecting mortal. Untamed was the word the played through his mind. I wonder if she'd be friends with me? For some reason the green eyes filled the empty hole of lonliness inside him with warmth. He felt strangely reluctant to speak or even move as if this was a dream that would disappear with the slightest touch of reality. However his mouth started speaking on its own echoing the thoughts in his mind. ".....a heavenly maiden....." Tokio started. A worried frown creased her forehead and she glanced at the thick bandages around his head. "Wow. I really did hit you too hard....." Suddenly memory came back to Hajime as to who this girl was and how he got into this mess. Wincing at the pain he sat bolt upright and pointing an accussing finger in her face shouted. "YOU??!!!" Tokio jumped off the bed in surprise. "What the hell did you hit me for you stupid ahou girl?! I was only trying to help you!" Guilt mixed with irration at the boy's insults did not sit well on someone of Tokio's volatile temperament. "Well who asked YOU to help anyway. Next time butt out where you're not wanted Wolf-chan!" The boy's eyebrow twitched ever so slightly. Oh no! Tokio clasped one small hand over her mouth. She groaned inwardly. I did it again! Twice in one day too. She could almost imagine Sou-ni, dressed in a monk's saffron robes and floating on a cloud, one hand resting serenely on his lap the other held in prayer position. "Tokio you must learn to control your temper," he reprimanded her in his usual soft gentle voice. They both looked towards the growing lump on the top his head. "Yes Tokio. You REALLY need to control your temper." Tokio giggled as she thought of her friend. The giggle turned to a frown as she thought of what was happening to him now.....Hajime passed a hand over the strange girl's eyes. "Hey is there anyone home in there? Hey." Shrugging his shoulder, he tried a different tactic. Positioning himself right beside her left ear he yelled. "Imbecil! Moron! Idiot!....." Tokio turned towards him a smile on her face. She bowed slightly. "I'm very sorry for hitting you Hajime. But I *was* being kidnapped so when I felt hands on my ropes.....well it *was* a natrural assumption to make, ne?" Hajime had been expecting another torrent of insults not the small cute smile that was now on her face. It made her little face even prettier...... Rattled by her smile, he could only stare down at his feet and mumble. "Yeah, whatever. I mean I suppose its OK if you didn't really mean it. But - " he looked up her with his amber eyes narrowed. "Next time I won't forgive you." She smiled again. "Hajime? Hajime?" It was Tokio's turn to wave her hands in front of the spaced-out boy. "Huh?" he looked confusedly down at her. "Do you want any food?" "Sure." He frowned slightly. "Hey, where's everyone else. I'd thought that there'll be servants all over you since you were kidnapped." Tokio looked down at her feet. "W-e-llll.....Normally yes but today...... everyone needs to look after Sou-ni......he's....he's going away......" "Huh? Who's this Sou-ni and why -?" She covered her ears with her hands. "I don't want to talk about it." "But - " "Lah, lah, lah, I can't hear you. I can't hear you. Lah, lah, lah...." Hajime scowled. "Oh just get the food will you." ******************************************************************************************** Half an hour later, Tokio sat at the table in her bedroom watching with amusement as Hajime continued to inhale the food. There were already ten plates piled beside him and he was still going. "You should see yourself eat." she laughed. "Well I haven't had much to eat for the past few days so....." She waved a small hand. "Don't worry. I understand." "Yeah sure, a rich little girl like you would really...." "Hey, just because I'm rich doesn't mean you can insult me like that. Its as bad as me making fun of you because you're poor!" Hajime looked guiltily down at his food. "Sorry" he mumbled. "That's OK. So where did you come from? You don't have to tell me if you don't won't though." she added hastily seeing his eyes narrowed. "I don't mind. My father always said I was a good judge of character and I think that you're a good person. Its just that I thought that if we were going to be friends....." "Hey, who ever said that we were friends?" Tokio's green eyes widened in shock and she looked away, her lower lip trembling. "Hey, hey, Tokio. Look I'm sorry I - I well I often say things I don't really mean. I didn't mean it that I didn't want to be your friend. " When there was no response he looked down miserably at his food. "I don't blame you if you don't want to be my friend anymore. I mean I'm such a mean guy and all....Its just I say mean things sometimes because I'm so angry and......l-lonely so......." He got up to leave. "Well thank-you for the meal. I won't bother you anymore....." He felt a hand on his shoulders. She was smiling at him again. For the first time in what felt like years - he smiled back, a genuine smile without any bitterness or sarcasm. "I think we got off to a bad start." She held out her hand. "Hello I'm Takagi Tokio of Aizu and I'm eight years old." Hajime looked down confusedly at the outstretched hand. "You're supposed to shake it. It's a Western thing." He grasped her hand and gave it a firm shake. "Hello. I'm Saitou Hajime. I'm twelve....I don't really come from anywhere but as long as you don't mind......" "I don't.....as long as....as long as.....you're not a demon from hell here to steal my soul?" Hajime's eyes widened in shock. "Um...No I don't think I am." "Good. Then we can be friends, right? You'll be my third!" "Y-yeah, well you'll be my first. Well I've never had any real friends before so I don't really know what to do so..." "That's OK. I haven't really had so much experience either. My first friends was was my father and he's dead. The second one is Sou-ni and now he's......" Tokio shivered slightly. Hajime decided not to press her on something that was so obviously painful. "So tell me how you know so much about Western things anyway?" ******************************************************************************************* The two children returned to the table. Hajime continued eating (albeit less like a pig). Tokio sighed and poked listlessly at her food. "Well, my father was an important Aizu official. However in his heart he was an engineer." "A what?" "It's a Western word. It means someone who designs things like roads, houses, dams, machines, that sort of stuff." "Oh. Like an inventor or a builder right?" "Sort of. Except they don't actually go and build the roads themselves. They just design them." "Oh." "He'd been sent on some missions to America by the Shogun and he saw the magnificant houses, roads and bridges they had there. Japan has a large problem with earthquakes you know, "earth-shudders". My father he wanted to learn how to build houses that could better withstand earthquakes. So he got permission from the Shogun to study in America. That's where he met my mother, who was the daughter of an important Japanese merchant." Tokio smiled bitterly. "My father - he was a dreamer. What he really wanted to do was to learn how to build good solid houses that even the poor could afford." "I was born in America. When I was five we came back to Japan. My father built his first "new-style" house.....we lived in it ourselves. It was much bigger than what he planned to build for everyone else but the basic design was the same. My father said he would never design a house that he wouldn't live in himself. But - but this was the time when anti-Western sentiments were highest. My father he liked to dress in Western clothes, the houses were Western looking and he was always going on about how, if Japan was to survive it had to embrace Western technologies. His other pet hate was the feudal system." "One day he went too far....." **************FLASHBACK******************************************** ('...' means spoken in English, "...." means in Japanese) 'Can I have some more please?' Tokio asked her mother. Smiling down at her five year old daughter, she put more mashed potatoes and meat on her plate. 'Thank-you very much, Mummy.' Takagi Miko turned to her husband. 'Dear. You have to start teaching the child Japanese. We *are* in Japan now not America.' Takagi Akira was the tall thin man with a gentle face with a pair of glasses perched on the end of his nose. Like the rest of his family he was wearing Western style clothes. In fact the whole house was decorated in the Western style. 'Huh? Of course after I finish negotiating with the damiyo for the land to build my housing estate. Why don't you teach her?' 'Dear. You know that my Japanese is not that good, after so many years in America. You can teach both of us.' 'Mmmm' 'Mummy. Can I go play with Freddy?" Miko sighed. 'No Tokio. You are not playing with that dog until you've finished practising the piano.' Tokio pouted. 'But Mummy - ' 'No!' A scowl appeared on the little girl's face. However it was soon replaced by a crafty smile. 'Daddy?' she called looking up at her father with her most winsome look. 'Huh? Oh its you Tokio?' he laughed pulling her up and placing her in his lap. 'What can Daddy do for you?' 'Da-a-d-dy. Mummy says that I can't play with Freddy until I've finished practising on the piano but its such a nice day and.....' her lower lip trembled. Laughing Akira picked up his daughter and touched her nose with his. 'Well I don't see why you shouldn't be allowed to play with Freddy. After all how can I say no to my little Munch-kin?' 'Yeah! You're the best Daddy in the world!' Tokio squealed and ran outside. 'Akira!' His wife disapprovingly at him. 'You really spoil that girl too much!' Her husband had the grace to look embarassed. 'Well I can't really say no to her....' Miko sighed. __________________________________________ 'Catch Freddy. Catch!' Tokio threw the stick in the air. The little terrier chased ferociously after it- in the wrong direction. Sighing the little girl decided to go get a drink before searching for her lost pet. Freddy had the worse directional sense she had ever seen in any creature or human. The Hibikis never mentioned *that* when they bought him. But it didn't matter. He was just s-o-o cute especially with the yellow black polka-dot bannanda. '....I don't think it was a good idea to bring her back.' It was her mothers's voice. Holding her hand over her mouth she carefully sneaked to the open door of the living room. Her parents had their backs to her. Her father was sitting in his plush arm-chair smoking a pipe and reading the newspaper. Her mother was sewing. 'Did you just want to leave her in America?' 'No but she doesn't really fit in here. She doesn't know Japanese for one thing....' 'She'll learn quickly. Children always do. Anyway she never had any friends in America. They always laughed at her and teased her for her 'slanty eyes' and 'weird looks'' 'Yes but it doesn't help that she always gets into fist fights whenever they start insulting Japan and Japanese in general. That's because you're always telling her how great it is to be Japanese. That you can do anything if you're Japanese.....' Her father shrugged his shoulders. 'Its true.' 'She doesn't fit in Japan! She's too, too Western. I think we did wrong by her. The American children don't like her because she 'looks weird' but here- she looks fine but her mind is all Western! She'll never fit anywhere!' Her father put his newspaper down. 'No. She doesn't fit in the Japan of the Tokagowa Shogunate. There is a big difference.' Her mother's voice rose, became almost hysterical. 'Now. Now what about the mess you've got us into. You and your idiotic dreams!' 'Miko! This is not the time or place!' Her mother dropped her sewing. 'Excuse me. I - I need to go to bed.' Her mother rushed out of the room. She was so distraught she didn't even notice her daughter hiding in the shadows next to the door. Tokio silently went back outside. What a confusing conversation! She had no idea what her parents were talking about. But what her mother said was true. Her father was always telling her about how great being Japanese were and that as soon as they got rid of the four-caste system whatever that was, Japan was going to be a great power. Tokio smiled. Oh well, her Daddy would know what to do. He was the best Daddy in the world! Lost in revere she hardly noticed when the front gate opened. A big man wearing two swords in his belt,a......samurai? Tokio frowned trying to remember the word her father used to describe the men at the market. He spoke something in Japanese. She shook her head. 'I'm sorry. I don't understand.' she said politely. The man laughed. He said something to his three companions. Tokio didn't know what it was but she picked up the words, "Western pig" (maybe because she heard it so many times these last few months) She lept up in righteous fury ready to bite and scratch when she felt her father's hand on her shoulder. 'Its all right Tokio. Go back inside.' 'But Daddy - ' 'NOW!' Tokio ran crying into the house. Her Daddy never yelled at her. Never! Her mother took one look at the men outside and ran inside. She picked up her daughter and ran into the main bedroom (the only room with locks). Frantically she locked the doors and closed the curtains over the windows. Then she sat on the bed, white and trembling, holding her daughter tightly. Tokio squirmed in her mother's tight grasp. She wanted to know what was going on! It was sunset. The setting sun cast a blood-red light through the curtain fabrics. Long shadows from the cabinet and table lengthened along the wooden floor. She could hear the grandfather clock in the hall outside ticking. Tick -tock, tick-tock. There was a lot of people outside, she could tell from the amount of noise. They were shouting things too. She couldn't understand it because it was in Japanese but even she could tell they were "bad" words. She couldn't bear it any longer. Twisting out of her mother's grasp she ran to the window and pulled open the curtains. They surrounded the house. There were at least a hundred of them. Most of them wore the torn filthy clothes of peasants and farmers. However some wore finer robes and the twin swords of samurai. The dying sun was behind them so she couldn't see their faces. However she could here the insults and threats they were yelling (even if she couldn't understand them). She could also see what they were carrying. Rough swords, picks and hoes. A burning cross was hoisted into the air as well as a model of a black ship. Three effigies one tall thin one dressed in a Western suit, one dressed in a Western gown and finally a small one dressed in a little frilly dress (Me!) were hoisted into the air Nooses were strung around their necks and then they were set on fire. Someone spotted her face in the window. A projectile was thrown. Tokio screamed when she saw the bloody head of her dog slide silently down the glass window. Her brave beautiful father was standing at the front door and arguing with the samurai. Suddenly one of them drew back his hand and sent her father sprawling along the ground. Tokio's infamous temper rose. Screaming in anger she unlocked the doors and rushed downstairs all before her mother could even move. 'TOKIO NO!' ___________________________________________________ 'Don't you dare hurt my father you mean bad guys!' she screamed as she rammed the one who had hit her father. He wasn't even moved by her attack, picking her up in one hand. 'What do we have here?' When Tokio got over her surprise at the perfect English, she bite the hand holding her - hard. The man let our a grunt of pain and threw her onto the ground. 'Tokio....' her father gasped hugging his daughter protectively. 'So Takagi-san....Are you willing to tell us where the things you got from America are.....or do you want us to unleash the crowd on you and your family. After hearing about what happened in Kyoto with the black ships....they are very shall we say antagonistic against anything Western.' 'No.......I can't betray.....' 'Why are you talking to my father like that you bad man?' Tokio glared up at the samurai. 'So...your daughter.' The samurai grinned revealing his teeth. 'Does she know her father is a .....traitor to Japan?' 'What are you talking about? My father would never betray Japan! He's the best Daddy in the world!' There was a strangled sob behind her. 'Daddy?' The samurai threw back his head and laughed. 'Ahh. The innocence of youth. Do you want us to tell her the truth, Takagi-san?' 'Shut up! SHUT UP!' Tokio stared at her white-faced trembling father in confusion. 'What's the matter Daddy. Don't worry I won't believe their lies.' 'I NEVER BETRAYED JAPAN. I DID IT ALL FOR JAPAN! I'LL NEVER TELL YOU WHERE I HID THEM! NEVER!' 'Daddy?!' 'Well you won't mind if we-?' The samurai pulled out his sword. 'Kill this one who trusts you so much?' 'Daddy?!' **************END FLASHBACK******************************************** "....one day a group of peasants and samurai came and -and they killed my father and mother and burned down our house. I survived because my father hid me in a secret hiding place - but there was only room for one....' "I-I'm sorry." Slowly as if he was afraid that she might reject him he put a hand on her shoulder. "But - it was a long time ago! (Well three years is a long time for an eight-year old) So I'm not sad anymore!" Hajime drew back, startled at her sudden exuberance. She jumped onto the chair. "One day I'll fulfill my father's dream of building cheap affordable earthquake proof, weather-proof houses! Like my father I-am-an - ENGINEER!" She punctuated her last remark by pounding enthusiastically on the table. Hajime lept frantically to prevent the food from spilling to the ground. Once he was no longer looking at her, Tokio allowed her smile to fade. She had never told anyone what really happened. She never told anyone that when the samurai had threatened her, her father had pulled out.... .......a gun. Suddenly she heard a "splat" sound. She turned around Hajime had not been quick enough to stop all the food sliding onto the ground. He had managed to save half the food before losing his footing and landing face down in a bowl of miso soup. Hajime removed the bowl from the top of his head. He slowly sat up. Tokio couldn't help but laugh at the sight of her new-found friend sitting looking rather forlorn in a pile of food. She thought he looked remarkedly like a playful wolf puppy who had just pulled down the tablecloth of the dinner table. Hajime slowly stood up. Pieces of meat and vegetables covered his whole body. He looked at the hysterically laughing girl, his eyes narrowed. Slowly one eyebrow twitched, then the corners of this mouth lifted up in a slight smile before he too started laughing. "This is all your fault you know." he accused the laughing girl. Tokio just stuck out her tongue at him. The smug expression on her face quickly turned to anger as he caught her tongue between his thumb and the index finger of his left hand. Smirking, Hajime stuck *his* tongue out at Tokio. However this time, she caught *his* tongue between her fingers. The two protagonists stood stock-still in the middle of a pile of food, each glaring at the other, each unwilling to give in. Spying a pot of (now cold) tea sitting on the table, Hajime gave his best wolf's grin. Taking the pot he emptied it over Tokio's head. Tokio stood there for a few minutes, quivering in righteous fury before taking a plate of curry chicken and mashing it into her enemy's face. The duo returned to glaring at each other, the status quo still in place. After several long minutes of mutual glaring, Hajime sighed. "Mummmmdfdh (Why don't we let go at the same time?)?" Tokio thought about this for a moment and nodded in agreement. She raised three fingers. Hajime nodded. Both put their free hands behind their backs. Tokio tapped her foot to keep time. One, two, three. Both let go of the other's tongue at the same time while bringing their free hands from behind their backs and smashing the cream pies they were holding into the other's face. They stared at each other for long minutes. They both burst out laughing, wiping the cream off their faces. "Great minds think alike I suppose." he gasped when he was finally able. He gave her a wide grin. "You know I'd never thought that I'd meet a girl as devious as me...." She giggled. "You know I like it when you smile like that. You look like you're planning something wicked!" "Then I'll have to do it more then," he laughed, giving her another grin. Tokio laughed. "Hey, did you also think - 'I only agreed to let go of his tongue. I never said anything about not throwing more food at him afterwards.' " "Oh definitely," he shrugged his shoulders. "After all if an opponent leaves themselves wide open there's no dishonour in taking the opportunity to strike if you hadn't promised not to beforehand." Tokio frowned. "Now that you put it that way.....Well I suppose its OK if your playing a joke or something but you'd have to be a real bastard to use that philosophy if you're actually trying to really hurt someone." The smile faded from Hajime's face. "Yeah......" Tokio was about to say something more when they heard sounds of people outside of the room. She gasped. "Oh no! When they see this mess, we're dead!" She grabbed Hajime's arm. "Come on!" "W-where are we going?" She pushed him out of the open window (fortunately they were on the ground floor.....). "To get cleaned up of course." She looked at the pile of food on the floor. "And away from here!" ************************************************************************* They only stopped running when they were a fair distance from the ruined room. After regaining his breath, Hajime looked around at their surroundings. They were in a beautifully maintained Japanese garden. In the distance was a large pond. It had a small island in the middle with a large tree growing from it. "Don't worry. No-one is going to come into this section of the house today. They're all busy - in the front." >From the sadness in her voice Hajime sensed that this had something to do with the mysterious "Sou-ni" but he decided not to press the issue. "So, why did you bring us here?" he asked her. "To get clean of course!" She flashed him a cheeky grin. "Last one to the pond is a big baka!" Then she was off. "Hey wait up you ahou girl!" Being four years older, male, with longer legs and more muscles, Hajime easily beat Tokio to the pond. In typical Hajime style instead of jumping right in, he stood on a large rock by the edge of the pond, whistling and waiting for his opponent to catch up. "You know I've been waiting here for oh five minutes now," he said almost conversationally, smirking. "My, my aren't you slow today." He sighed pushing back a stray lock of hair. "Yare yare, I suppose boys *are* superior to girls so its hardly your fault." His superior expression grew even more as Tokio gave him the glare of death. However a mischievous expression appeared on her face as she prepared to kick the rock he was standing on. "Oh pl-ea-se," he sighed, rolling his eyes. "There is no way on earth you have the strength to kick that rock into the water." Toko grinned. "Ah, but you see Hajime I haven't told you something." "Oh and what's that." "For the past few months I've been experimenting on various construction materials - " she frowned. "Well I was before Lord Okita got rid of all my materials and tools." Hajime raised an eyebrow. "And why did he do that?" Tokio grew beet-red. "Well it was an honest mistake. It could have happened to anyone really!" The eyebrow went even higher. She gestured wildly with her hands. "I mean the book never said that if you added carbon to the mixture, it would form a compound that is unstable and potentially explosive." " I have no idea what you're talking about but I do know what the word 'explosive' means. So what exactly *did* you blow up?" Tokio grew even redder if that was at all possible. Looking down at her feet she replied in a quiet voice. "Um.....the family shrine...." She smiled brightly. "ANYWAY, back to the topic at hand!" She gestured at the rock Hajime was standing on. "That Wolf-chan may look like a rock, it may feel like a rock but -" she kicked it sending it and the person standing on it into the water. "-it's much much lighter than a rock." This time it was her turn to smirk, as she stood on one of the other rocks on the edge of the pond, watching "Wolf-chan" flail around in the water. He swam to the edge of the pond, a furious expression on his face." "YOU?!" Tokio sighed. "Yare, yare. I suppose girls *are* superior to boys so its hardly your fault that you're such a baka." Instead of scowling as expected, Hajime merely grinned. "Hey Tokio!" he called. "Yes my dear Wolf-chan?" "You know," he said conversationally. "You really shouldn't stand there." She rolled her eyes. "Oh pl-ea-se. This is a real rock." The grin became positively wolf-like an his amber eyes started to gleam. "Yes but standing there - " with one quick movement, he grabbed her leg and pulled her into the water. " - its so easy for someone to pull you into the water." "HAJIME!" He stuck his tongue out at her (from a safe distance away of course). His efforts were rewarded by an enormous wave of water. "So that's the way she wants it then," he muttered before entering whole-heartedly into the waterfight. For a while only sounds of splashing water and shrieking could be heard from the pond until suddenly a girl's voice rang out. "Hajime! Don't you dare! Don't you dare put that frog down my back...... AAHHHHHH! HAJIME! YOU ARE DEAD! DO YOU HEAR ME! YOU ARE -" "YOU'LL HAVE TO CATCH ME FIRST AHOU!" ************************************************************************** The two children sat on the rooftop overlooking the street, silently watching the sun set. It was Tokio who broke the companionable silence first. "So, Wolfchan, what do you want to be when you grow up?" Hajime sat on the roof silently, his head resting on his knees. After several long minutes, he sighed, lifting his head to catch the last rays of the dying sun. "I really don't know. I-I'm not good at much - besides being sneaky and stealing." Like her companion, Tokio sat gazing directly forward at the blood- red sky. "You don't seem the type to want to live that sort of life willingly." Hajime lowered his eyes. "My family - we used to be honourable samurai. Then - then my father, he -", his lips curled into a bitter smile. " - he developed a liking for sake. We lost everything and were forced to live in the slums." "My father - he wasn't much use for anything. All he did all day was drown his sorrows in sake, beating his wife and moaning about how badly fate had treating him. I -" his right hand curled into a fist. " - I was the one who provided for the family. I was the one who kept everyone fed and clothed. How else could I do it? I didn't want to be that way but- " His right fist came crashing down onto the roof-tiles. "- but the worse thing was I-I started *enjoying* it. Enjoying being sneaky and scheming. It was *fun* setting up schemes and traps and watching people whose only fault was being stupid or naïve walking into them." Tokio interrupted him. "But isn't that we do when we play jokes -" Hajime's face tightened. "There is a big difference between playing jokes and-and what I did. When we play jokes we don't mean to hurt anyone and if we do we feel bad but - the things I set up - people got *hurt*, no-one was killed, but sometimes they were badly hurt. The thing is I didn't care......I see someone crying on the street because of what I did and I don't care...." "I don't know why - its as if my heart is growing numb, as if there is another me growing inside of me. It's been getting worse since I since my father died and especially when I started searching for my sister and saw-saw all that suffering.....Its like there's someone malicious and-and bad inside of me who likes to see people helpless before me and-and who loves the power. I-I didn't even realize before today - when I actually played, *played* for the first time since I was four, the difference between a joke meant only for fun and the cold unfeeling schemes that I'm used to. Its as if I'm changing, slowly, so slowly that I can't even notice, but changing none-the-less into someone I don't know and don't particularly like." Hajime started in surprise as he felt someone grasp his right hand. Only then did he realize that he was holding it in a fist so tightly that the knuckles shone white. Small chubby fingers gradually pried apart his stiff fingers until his palm laid bare. Then they intertwined with his long elegant calloused fingers. "Hajime," he looked upward into deep green eyes. "Hajime you are my friend do you understand? Do you?" Tokio's voice was hard and demanding. Hajime could only nod. "I never betray my friends. *Never*. I don't care what you become because I'll know that underneath you're my Wolf-chan." Hajime gulped, lost in shock. "Really?" he managed to squeak out eventually. Tokio gave a solemn nod. A smile broke through the serious expression on her small face. "Hey! Let's make a friendship pact?" Hajime blinked. "A what?" "You know - a ceremony in which we promise to be friends forever." Her forehead curved into a cute little frown. "Hmmm. Now to think of one....." Her face suddenly brightened. "Yes!" Reaching into her kimono, she pulled out a jade pendant tied around her neck with a red string. Untying it she carefully placed the pendant in her obi. "What's that for?" Hajime asked curiously, pointing at the red string. Tokio sighed exasperately. "Stupid. We're supposed to tie the string around the little fingers of our right hand and then we each put a drop of blood on it." (NOTE: An invisible red string is supposed to connect destined lovers........ Author looks away and whistles non-chalently.....) Hajime frowned. "You know I think that I've heard of that ritual somewhere before but I don't think that its for friendship." He banged his hand against his forehead. "Damn - I remember it being mentioned in a poem. I don't think I liked the poem very much. Too sappy I think. I remember it had something to do with moonlight, a boat....." Tokio considered this for a moment. "Nahh. I mean why do we need moonlight or a boat?" Hajime shrugged his shoulders. "I suppose you're right.....But...." Tokio raised an eyebrow. "Hey. Its either this or we go for a blood oath." "A blood oath?" "You know we slit our wrists, fill a bowl with both our blood mixed together, drink it and swear that if either of us betray the other, may our great-great great-great-great child get warts on unmentionable parts of their bodies." Hajime gulped. "Let's go for your first idea." The two children carefully tied one end of the red string around their little fingers, then biting the forefingers of their left hands they each smeared a drop of their blood on the already blood-red string. "There," Tokio said with satisfaction. "Now we'll be together forever - as friends." Hajime smiled. Tokio just stared at him. It was different from his usual smirks and triumphant smiles at a trick he had just pulled off or his amused smile at something she did that he found funny. It was a genuine, happy-to-be alive smile that reached his eyes. His eyes had changed too. They were relaxed slightly from his usual narrowed gaze and the amber irises had widened considerably and were almost normal. The tension she had sensed in his lean body was slowly ebbing away and the harsh lines on his face seemed softened somehow, though that may have been the result of the soft light of the dying sun illuminating his face. She smiled in response. He started laughing for no apparent reason. It was a clear happy laughter that rang through the air. Eventually he collapsed onto the roof, holding his aching stomach, still laughing. Toko smiled even wider. "What was that for?" she asked the now almost calmed-down Hajime. He turned his face to her. "I don't know. I just felt like laughing." He put his hands behind his head still smiling. "You asked me what I wanted to do when I grew up." He sighed. "A year ago - my mother and father -" he paused for a moment, " -had an accident. I set off to search for my sister, Mato the only one still alive." The sun had now set. The first stars should have been appearing in the night sky but unnoticed to both children, a heavy cloud cover had developed, completely blocking the shining light of the stars. But Hajime looked upwards anyway, instead of looking at Tokio. "For a year I wandered Japan alone, following my sister's trail....." "It must have been very lonely......" Hajime looked startled for a moment. A strange gleam appeared in his amber eyes which he disappeared when he began to chuckle. "I never thought about it but I suppose I was.....Yes I was.....sleeping in the countryside at night alone with only a small fire to protect myself from the wild animals in the shadows . But the worse was actually in the cities and towns. To see people together, laughing and talking while you yourself - the worse were families. It hurt, a lot but I couldn't help but search them out in the crowd with my eyes...." He chuckled again. "I suppose I didn't realize it until now because I suppose I'm so used to it. Even when I did have a family - my father was useless. I was more of a father than a brother or a son. I loved my sisters but I don't think any of them were ever my friends." He sighed. "No, its not that you get so used to it that you like it but eventually after a long time you're so used to feeling the emptiness that it seems to become a part of you." Tokio slapped him on the head. "Ouch! What was that for?" "Stop being so melancholy. I mean you have me now and when he's um better you will have Sou-ni today so you don't need to feel lonely anymore. A sudden idea came to her. "Hey! When you find your sister why don't you come live here?" Hajime sat up. "Really?" Tokio smiled brightly up at him. "Of course! Well you'll have to be a servant for at least a while......Do you mind?" Hajime smiled back. "Of course not. Why do you ask?" "Well......its just that some samurai are very touchy you know about honour and stuff." He thought about this for a moment. "I-I suppose it was important to me once. But I've been through so much this past year alone. I think that just being together with friends is more important than any half-assed samurai code thing." "All I want to do is to find my sister and live in peace." He smiled brightly at her. "Anyway I don't think that I'd be any good at that sort of stuff anyway. I mean can you imagine me with a sword? I just got beaten up by a girl today!" Suddenly the smile faded. Swirling images of ghostly children, their bloodies arms held out to him in supplication filled his mind. So weak.....A sudden image of the downtrodden face and broken spirit of his mother flashed through his mind. So weak...... "Hajime, Hajime are you alright?" Gasping, he turned around and found himself staring into Tokio's concerned face. He gave her a weak smile. "Of course.....I'm just tired that's all." They both shivered as a cold wind blew through their still damp clothing. "The wind its picking up....." Tokio said quietly. "I think that they'll be a storm tonight." "Yes...." Hajime agreed. Lightning crashed. Hajime's eyes grew wide as the lightning illuminated Tokio's face. It was so white it was almost ghostly. For a brief moment he could see her and then once the lightning was gone she faded back into the darkness. She seemed llike an insubstantial spirit slipping away from him. He reached out for her but he stopped half-way. A part of him felt certain that she wouldn't be there - that she would be gone like everyone else in his life. He almost jumped out of his skin when he felt a hand grasp his arm. "Come on!" Tokio screamed over the howling wind. "If we stay up here we might get hit!" Hajime nodded dumbly still lost in his revere. He allowed Tokio to pull him back to her room. It was beginning to be difficult to walk as the rapidly growing wind blasted leaves and twigs into their faces and bodies. The house was eerily silent with no lights on except at the very front. It was as if they were the only living beings in the house. They made it to the front door when an ear-piercing shriek could be heard above the howling of the wind. It wasn't the wind - unless the voice of the wind could carry the sound of immeasurable pain and torment. "Sou-ni......" Tokio said under her breath, her face growing pale. "He's escaped.....and he's not better yet. Oh no. We're all going to die. No I refuse to believe it....he would never hurt me...." "What?" asked Hajime thoroughly confused. "What's going - " "Wait here!" Tokio cried. "Please....don't leave." Hajime looked confused. "I won't", he promised. He was going to say more but she ran into her room, shutting the door in his face. The piles of food still laid on the floor but Tokio ignored them completely as she ran to her "special" chest. It was special as it had a false bottom. Throwing the books from the chest onto the floor she opened the bottom. She took out the cloth covered bundle which was the only content. Holding it carefully in her lap she unwrapped the last gift her father gave her and her only momento of the time before......The silverly metal was smooth and cool to the touch. There were still four out of six bullets left in it. She knew that very well. It should have been impossible to see in the dark but somehow she could see the bloody fingerprints on the metal of the gun where her father had held it to give to her. She lifted the heavy gun in her small right hand, remembering her father's words. How true that was, she reflected numbly. A single tear slid down her cheek. She ran out of the room, carrying the gun in her hands, her sight blurred by tears. Hajime made to follow when a thought came to him that stopped him in mid-movement. "....market..." that was what that poor mutilated girl had said. "You promised to bring me something from the market." was what his sister said. The pieces began to fall into place - his inability to find his sister even though he was certain she was in that place, the two girls' same age, his feelings...... Oh no. He had left her there. While he was playing with Tokio while he was....happy she...... All thoughts of his promise to Tokio left his mind as he grabbed his backpack and scaled the wall to the house..... Tokio could barely stifle her scream when the decapitated body fell in front of her. But there was a worse sight in front of her. There in the courtyard, naked except for a loincloth, his hair long and unkept streaming down her back stood Okita Soujiro. His feet were still shackled but his hands were free. In his right hand he held a short sword. He was covered head to toe in blood. As she stood watching he plunged the sword into the belly of his former master, one of the best fighters in all of Aizu. He seemed to sense her presence. His eyes glowed red... he was mad..... "Please, please leave Tokio," came his hoarse whisper. "Or I-I'll have to kill you too." He clutched his head. "Get out of my head! The voices....." He grew calm again. "You have a gun.....your father gave it to you....you're going to shoot me." "So its true, you can read thoughts. That's why you're so good now with the sword....Why...." He clutched his head again. "The voices....the pain." When he looked at her his eyes were mad again. "I have to kill everyone.... if everyone is dead I won't have these voices in my head. I have to kill you." " I told you before," she replied. "I'll never abandon you. I'll always do what's best for you." With that she aimed the gun in her hands at her friend. Hajime ran blindly through the streets until he came to the mansion he staked out the night before. Scaling the walls he lept into the courtyard. Racing into the servant quarters he threw open the first door he saw. The good news was that it was the right door. That was also the bad news. "No...No! NO! NO!! NO-OOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!" NOTES: Another long chapter.....I swear this was meant to be a pure waff chapter.....but oh well. Okita at the end....the inspiration for that was this science fiction novel. The two main characters were a pair of autistic twins. They are actually the greatest geniuses the world had seen but with their great power came the ability to read minds. However they lacked the ability to properly build defences against it so in order to prevent themselves from going insane from the mental "noise" they retreated inside their own mental barriers totally blocking themselves from the outside world. I was going to have Okita as a raving animal who drank the blood of his enemies but then I thought it was too cliché. As for Tokio's character boy has that gone through so many alterations. The "gun-smuggling father" thing came about purely by accident I swear. I didn't even intend for her to have a real past then I thought it would be interesting for her to have some sort of dream eg. doctor, school-teacher but I settled for engineer because everything else had been done before or was impossible (world-traveller) to achieve given what we know about her from the anime. Everything sort of just wrote itself after that.....Though I have to admit there is a very strong Wong Fei Huang influence in her flashbacks. There will be a very interesting twist to Tokio's past in the next chapter. As a hint, a very important character (not Kenshin) will be appearing in her next flashback.....Boy was the Saitou revealing his secret feelings thing hard to write. I'm still not particularly satisfied with it, but I'm too tired to try again. ****************** **************************************** TEASER FOR CHAPTER FIVE - HOPE AND HOPELESSNESS Hajime and Tokio both face a turning point in their lives. Each must battle the forces of evil. Tokio in the form of a "mad" Okita and Hajime the demons in his own mind. Each will find strength from a different source One from the light and one from the shadows. Tokio felt the knife slowly sink into her chest. Okita pressed his lips against hers. * My first kiss *. She could taste the blood on his lips. * Sou-ni..* Her eyes widened. * No! I mustn't give up hope! I know Sou-ni will never kill me. I must believe that! I must not give up! * "Please Older Brother. Just give in and die. Some people were never meant to know happiness. What can you do? Everyday people - innocents - women and children die and everytime no-one cares. We.. will never be anything. No one cares about us. Some people..are never destined to know happiness. Just give in and die Hajime. Don't be like me. I tried so hard to survive this past year. I hoped so much that someone would care enough to .. I believed that as long as I endured that as long as I was good that someday the gods would look down on me and say that is a good girl who has suffered so much. Let her brother find her and let them both be happy. Let her have a normal body so that....But it never came true. I hear my tormentors and people on the street complain about the government never giving them any of their rights and I wanted to scream -'What about me?! You have clothes to wear and food to eat. You don't have a mutilated body.....Why are you complaining about not being able to speak freely when I have had my fingernails pulled out. When I've been burnt with hot tongs.... Why isn't there anyone to care about people like me?' I had so much hope that someday the gods would give me just a shred of the happiness that normal little girls know but...And think Hajime of our time in the slums. Stealing and lieing just to have a scrap to eat. And all those people in fancy clothes look at us like we were nothing but scum. Not one of them cared. No one cares. Not even our parents. It was our Father who did this to me.. Oh Hajime I had so much hope. I wanted to live so much. I tried so hard when others just gave up and died and now look at me .. Die Hajime, please die..Don't fight anymore. People like us will never know happiness. Promise me Hajime that you will die tonight..with me.." ********************** *********************************